Whirlwind
by Tuttle
Summary: Everything spins out of control for Dixie when tragedy strikes. NOW COMPLETE!
1. Chapter One

Whirlwind  
  
"No matter how tough it gets along the way, if we hold on to two things, we'll do okay. Two things, Dixie. Humor and Love." ~Tad Martin  
  
"If I had to live this day over, I wouldn't change one blessed thing. Not one step that got me here with you right now. I want to be here. I belong here. I love you more than anything. And what's more... I don't want to live without you. You are an answer to a very big question: Where's the rest of my heart? Dixie, you're in my blood. You're in a place in me so deep no one else is ever gonna be able to get there again." ~Tad Martin  
  
"You clod-don't you know by now that I would just curl up and die inside if anything ever happened to you? Even if this is it, even if we don't go any further than this, even if we're not together, and even if you and Brooke and Jamie move off to the high end of nowhere-I wouldn't want to live in a world without you in it." ~Dixie Cooney  
  
  
  
The shades in the bedroom were pulled, but the sunlight from outside still seemed to make its way in. Tad rolled over and looked at Dixie, who was sleeping soundly beside him. Even lying in bed in the morning, Dixie still let off the most radiant beauty that Tad had ever seen. He lifted his hand and slowly ran it across her face, brushing ever so gently back on her head, her soft, beautiful curls.  
  
Dixie stirred, letting out a soft moan, as she rolled on to her side and glanced into Tad's eyes. "Good morning," Dixie said, smiling.  
  
Tad crept closer to her, letting his lips find his way to hers. "It sure is," Tad said as he continued to kiss her, moving down her neck.  
  
"Easy there, tiger," Dixie said, gently pushing him away. "It's still a little early in the day for a replay of last night."  
  
"Grrr," Tad roared, going back to kissing her. "But this is one of those instant replays."  
  
Dixie locked her fingers behind his neck. "Tad." she said. "Later." Discouraged, Tad pulled away. "What time is it?"  
  
"About eight o'clock."  
  
Dixie quickly shot up in bed and looked at her watch. "Eight o'clock? I'm late again."  
  
"Oh, so you're a little late," Tad said as Dixie jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom.  
  
"This is the third time in two weeks. What am I going to say this time?"  
  
"Why don't you."  
  
"I'm sorry I'm late, Constance. I was in bed with my husband."  
  
"Constance Andrews?" Tad asked her. "Miss Andrews with the mole and the."  
  
"Tad," Dixie said, stepping out of the bathroom, searching for her shoes.  
  
"What?" Tad asked as he discretely slipped into a pair of pants. "That lady must be ancient. I mean she was old when I went to PVE." He leaned over with a pair of shoes. Dixie snatched them from his hand. "And I was going to say, why don't you tell her you overslept."  
  
"What am I going to do with you?" Dixie asked. Tad raised his eyebrows. "Don't you dare answer that." She smiled.  
  
"Go," Tad said. "Before you're later than you already are."  
  
Dixie bent down and kissed him on the forehead. "Maybe later you could show me that replay."  
  
Tad kissed her. Dixie started to leave the room as Tad stood from the  
  
bed and called to her. "Hey, Dix." Dixie turned to him. "Be careful out there. The roads are covered with ice."  
  
Dixie nodded. "I'll see you after work." Dixie left the room, closing the door and Tad went over to the window. He waited for Dixie to walk out the front door and watched as she got into her car and pulled away.  
  
No sooner had Dixie's car cleared the driveway that the phone rang. "JR!" Tad called as he slipped into a pair of clean clothes. The phone continued to ring. It took Tad a second to realize why. "Monday... School." He quickly hopped over the bed and picked up the receiver. "Hello... Sorry, Maria, you just missed her... That's OK, I forgot it was Monday too... I'll have her call you when she gets home... Not a problem... Bye."  
  
Tad hung up the phone and searched desperately for a piece of paper. "Call Maria, Call Maria," he kept repeating so he wouldn't forget. "Ah," He pulled a piece of paper out of the dresser drawer. "Pen." Tad now grabbed the paper and started looking for a writing utensil. "Pen, pen, pen." Tad chanted as he walked down into the kitchen and rustled through drawers until he came upon a ball-point pen. "OK," he said as he put the pen down to the paper. "Call M-A-R." He stopped, shaking the pen up and down. "Come on," he said, talking to it, as if by doing that, the ink would flow. It didn't. Tad went back to the drawers. "Come on, Dix," he said. "What kind of teacher doesn't have any pens in her house?" Tad took a deep breath. He made his way to the front door, reached for his coat and car keys, and exited the house.  
  
  
  
Dixie sat in her empty classroom. Lunch was the only free time that she really had, so she pulled out her cell phone and dialed the house. the phone rang over and over again, but the answering machine never picked up. She hung up and dialed Tad's cell. It too rang a few times before the voice message came on.  
  
"Hey, Tad," she said, running her fingers back through her curls. "It's me. It's not important... I guess I'll just see you when I get home."  
  
Dixie hung up the phone as she heard a knock on her classroom door. It swung inward and a uniformed police officer entered. "Dixie Martin?" he asked.  
  
"Yes." Dixie's heart was in her mouth.  
  
"I need you to come with me."  
  
"Is it Junior?" Dixie asked. "Did he do something?"  
  
"Please come with me, ma'am."  
  
Dixie didn't like that she wasn't getting any answers. She stepped out of the room with the officer and was taken back at what she saw. There, Jamie Martin stood, his face stricken with fear and his eyes on the verge of letting loose a waterfall of tears.  
  
Now Dixie knew that something definitely wasn't right. "What are you doing here?" Dixie asked Jamie. "What's wrong?"  
  
"They came to school," Jamie said.  
  
"Is there something wrong with your brother?" Dixie started. "Did he..."  
  
"It's Dad." Jamie bit his bottom lip. "He was in an accident. They won't tell me anything else."  
  
"Oh no," Dixie started to cry. Jamie wanted to be strong for her. "Oh, God."  
  
"Mom took JR to the hospital..."  
  
"We have to get there." Dixie said. "We have to get there." Dixie was crying uncontrollably now. She felt herself grow weak in the knees, and Jamie took her arm to stable her. "He's OK," Dixie said as they started to leave the school. "He's alright. He just has to be alright. He has to be." 


	2. Chapter Two

Dixie ran into the hospital. Through all the confusion, she had managed to lose Jamie, and at that moment, wasn't even worried about finding Brooke and JR. She was shaking uncontrollably. "Where is he?" she asked with a quiver in her voice. "Tad. Tad Martin. Is he OK?" It seemed as though Dixie was losing her mind. "Why won't anybody tell me anything?"  
  
"Dixie?" Jake walked up to her and took her by the arms to steady her. "Calm... calm down." He led her to a seat.  
  
"Why won't anybody tell me what happened to Tad. I just want to know that he's OK. Jake, what happened? Where is he? Please."  
  
"Tad's car skid on the ice," Jake tried to explain to her, but as Tad's brother, he was finding it difficult. "He... he hit a tree."  
  
The tears were streaming down Dixie's face. "But he is alright, Jake," She said. "Tad's OK, isn't he?" Jake was silent. "Jake?"  
  
"He hit his head..." he began. "Hard, Dixie. He's not awake. they don't know how long it will be before he does wake up."  
  
"But he will. Tad... will wake up, and he'll be fine."  
  
"Dixie... I'm not going to lie to you. I don't know."  
  
Dixie closed her eyes and brought her hands up to her face. Jake put his arms around her as she cried on his shoulder. "I want to see him."  
  
"We can do that," Jake said. He took her hand and slowly took her to a room and stopped outside the door. "Before you go in there, I just want to warn you. There are a lot of machines..." Dixie nodded, clearly just wanting to see her husband. They pushed their way inside.  
  
Dixie slowly approached Tad's bed. He was lying more still than she had ever seen him. His forehead was bruised and had a gash on it. He had machines hooked up to him, monitoring his heart rate and breathing.  
  
All of a sudden, the room started spinning. Dixie took hold of a chair as her legs began to wobble. Sitting down, she put her head in her hands for a moment while everything returned to normal.  
  
Dixie reached her hand out and took Tad's. "Tad?" she said, rubbing his hand. "Can he hear me? she asked Jake.  
  
"I think he can." Dixie looked up at Jake as if asking him, silently, to leave her alone with Tad. "I'll... be out there if you need me," Jake said, taking her hint.  
  
Dixie waited until Jake had completely left the room before she took a seat on the edge of Tad's bed. "If you can hear anyone, you can hear me. So...I need you to listen to me, Tad. I need you to open up your eyes so we can go home." Dixie paused a moment, waiting for Tad to comply. When he didn't as much as flinch, Dixie continued. "Come on, Tad," she cried. "This isn't funny... This isn't..." Dixie paused, trying to compose herself. "Oh, God, Tad" she said as she ran her fingers back through his hair. "Why did this happen? You're going to be OK. I promise. You're going to be fine. I'm not going anywhere until you're better." She rested her head down on his chest. "I'm going to stay right here with you in this hospital until you wake up." Dixie sniffled. "You can't leave me, Tad. My life is over if you do. I'd just die if you..." Dixie silently wept, moving her hand up and down Tad's chest.  
  
"Jamie and Junior are here. And Brooke too, and Jake. They're all here," Dixie said after a while. "Somewhere," she added under her breath. "We all want you to wake up." She sat erect and went back to combing her fingers back through his hair. "We love you so much. I love you." Dixie wiped her eyes again. "Look at you. Just this morning everything was fine. You warned me about the ice before I went to work and now..."  
  
The door of the room opened slowly and Jamie walked in, his head down. Dixie stood and walked over to him and he fell into her arms. Jamie just couldn't hold it in any longer.  
  
"Shh," Dixie said. "It's alright. It's all going to be OK, Jamie."  
  
"I can't see him like this," Jamie said through his tears.  
  
"He's still the same person. He's still your father. You don't have to be afraid of him."  
  
Jamie looked up and started to make his way towards the bed. His steps were small, like a child learning to walk. His ran his shirt sleeve under his nose.  
  
"You can talk to him," Dixie told him. "Go ahead."  
  
Jamie felt awkward at first. "Hey, Dad," he started. "It's me. It's Jamie."  
  
"I'll leave you with him for a little while," Dixie said.  
  
Jamie was silent as he hear the door open. "Dixie?" he said, turning around. She faced him. "Thanks."  
  
Dixie turned again and exited the room. She took a deep breath as she headed to the elevator. She rode it down to the lobby and then quickly walked outside. She needed some air. Out of habit, Dixie clicked her cell phone on. She leaned up against the side of the building, just to stand there a while to clear her mind.  
  
Suddenly, Dixie's cell phone began to beep. She picked it up and noticed the voice message icon. She proceeded to dial into her mailbox and put the phone to her ear.  
  
"Message received at 8:17 AM," the computer generated voice said, before the message began to play. "Guess who?" Dixie's eyes began to water at the sound of Tad's voice. "Maria just called. Give her a call. I'm on my way out now to buy some pens. What do you grade your papers with, Dix?" Tad laughed. "Hey, while I'm out, I'll make reservations at that restaurant you like. Then later tonight we'll go... back to the video tape. I'll call you later. Love you."  
  
Dixie pulled the phone away from her ear and sank to the ground, sliding her back against the wall. "Oh," she sobbed. "Why did you go out for me?" her emotions were running wild. "Why did you go, Tad?" Dixie cried loudly. She just couldn't gain control of herself. "Why?" 


	3. Chapter Three

Jamie and JR sat in the hospital waiting room. JR slouched back in his chair, supporting his head with his hands. Jamie stood and began pacing the room.  
  
"Will you sit down," JR said, annoyed. Jamie ignored him. JR stood and approached him, violently putting his hands on his shoulders.  
  
"What's your problem?" Jamie said, pulling away. "Get your freakin' hands off me."  
  
"Hey!" Jake yelled, noticing the boys' argument for outside the room. He ran in, positioning himself between them. "Both of you. That's enough."  
  
"He started it," Jamie said, almost childish, turning his back on them.  
  
"I don't care who started it," Jake said. "End it." The boys rolled their eyes. "Now." JR and Jamie still wouldn't look at eachother. "This is not the time to be at eachother's throats. This is the worst time for that."  
  
JR shook his head. "I'm outa here," he said, pushing past Jake and Jamie.  
  
"JR!" Jake called after him. JR just threw up his hands and kept walking. He boarded the elevator and, surprisingly, was the only one there. JR just wanted to let out a loud scream. This was all just too unbearable for him. He had never thought that anything like this would ever happen. He stepped off and into the lobby and made his way to the front door. He walked outside and paused a moment, letting the cold breeze blow back the hair on his head.  
  
Without speaking a word, JR turned to his left and pulled back his leg, flinging it forward and kicking a trash can. He just wanted to tear the world apart. It wouldn't take back what had happened, but for the moment, it would help him feel a little better. JR turned now to his right and saw Dixie, leaning up against the hospital, weeping.  
  
JR's anger became suppressed for a moment as he approached Dixie and sat on the cold ground beside her. They didn't say a word to eachother. JR put his arm around her shoulder. Dixie tried her hardest to pull herself together for her son. JR pulled Dixie into an embrace as she started to hyperventilate.  
  
"Deep breaths, Mom," JR said, growing more concerned for his mother as she began shaking in his arms. "Let's go inside," he said, helping her to her feet. Dixie clung to JR as he started to lead her back into the hospital. Dixie still couldn't get a handle on what was happening. She felt responsible for what happened to Tad. The stress was overwhelming.  
  
As JR and Dixie reached the lobby, Dixie's grip loosened up on JR's arm. Her knees buckled and she fell to the floor. JR got down and put his arms behind her back, leaning her up a little.  
  
"Hey!" JR called. "Help! Mom." Suddenly, doctors and nurses swarmed around JR and Dixie.  
  
"What's her name, son?" one of the doctors asked JR.  
  
"Dixie," JR said nervously. "Dixie Martin." JR was shaking. "It could be her heart. Her heart is..."  
  
The doctor turned to one of the nurses. "Page doctor Martin. Get him to the ER now." He looked at JR. "We'll take care of your mom."  
  
There was nothing that JR could do, but stand back and watch as Dixie was rushed off to the emergency room. He took a seat and just waited as the time ticked by on the clock.  
  
"JR." JR looked up at the entranceway. Coming towards him was Adam Chandler. "What happened?"  
  
"Why are you here?" JR asked him.  
  
"One of the... the nurses recognized you and called," Adam said. "You're mother. Is she alright? Have you heard anything?"  
  
"Like you even give a damn about her."  
  
"What are you talking about? Of course I care about her."  
  
"No, you never did. You just... used her to get what you wanted. And then you threw her aside."  
  
"You know that isn't true."  
  
"Isn't it though, Dad? You wanted a son, you got me. Then you made poor mom think she was crazy and you can still stand there and say that you care about her? Give me a break."  
  
JR stood and pushed passed Adam. Adam snapped his hand out and grabbed JR by the arm. "I'm still your father," Adam said.  
  
"And everyone knows it," JR said. "No matter where I go I can't escape you, can I? Oh, look it's Adam Chandler's son. Isn't that Adam Chandler's son? I'm tired of it, Dad. I'm sick of just being Junior Adam Chandler." JR pulled away from him. "I'm sick of it. I'm not you. I'll never... be you."  
  
"JR," Jake approached them. "Adam?"  
  
"Is she OK?" JR asked him.  
  
Jake nodded. "She's going to be just fine. The stress was just too much for her. She's in 205. You can go see her."  
  
JR started towards the elevator. Adam began to follow him. "Don't," JR said, disgusted. He stepped onto the elevator and the doors began to close. "Don't even bother following me." The doors slid closed and Adam stepped back.  
  
JR waited impatiently for the elevator doors to open. It seemed like forever, but they finally did and he made his way down the hall to room 205.  
  
He pushed his way in and saw Dixie lying in bed. "Mom," he said as he approached her. Dixie propped herself up. "You scared me to death," he admitted.  
  
"I'm sorry," Dixie said softly, as JR took a seat beside her. She lifted her hand and cupped his cheek. "Jake said I could get out of here in a day or two."  
  
"Did he say what happened? I mean, medically?.."  
  
"I'm fine," Dixie said. "It's not my heart. I know that's what you're worried about."  
  
"I am worried about you, mom," JR said. "After today..."  
  
"I know," Dixie wiped her eyes. "You're a good kid, Junior. Don't let anyone tell you differently."  
  
JR smiled. Dixie could see good in everyone, but just hearing those words form his mother reinforced in JR's mind that he was more than just his father's son.  
  
There was a knock at the door. Dixie and JR turned their heads as Jake entered the room. "Can I talk to your mom for a minute?" Jake asked.  
  
JR didn't want to leave Dixie. "Go ahead," Dixie said to JR. JR kissed her on the forehead and left the room. Jake walked closer to Dixie and sat down. "What is it?" Dixie asked. "Tad?"  
  
"No, no," Jake said. "It's nothing about Tad. It's you I'm worried about now."  
  
"Why? I thought you said..."  
  
Jake stopped her. "We just got some more of your labs back. You need to take it easy for a while, Dixie. The stress is a lot for you to handle right now." Dixie was silent. "As your doctor, I suggest you stay in bed for a few days, or you're going to go through the whole ordeal with your heart again. We don't want that to happen, but judging from you passing out before, that's exactly the direction you're heading if you don't take it easy." Dixie still didn't say a word. "Now... as your brother-in-law, I want you to know that deep in my heart, I know that everything is going to be fine. I'm here for you, Dixie. For anything you need, just ask." Dixie bit her bottom lip. "We'll get through it. We'll all help eachother through this, no matter how long it takes. OK?" Dixie nodded as Jake took hold of her hand. "I'll check in on you a little later."  
  
Jake stood and walked to the door, leaving Dixie alone in the room. She would need everyone's support, she thought, because if Tad didn't wake up soon, she might not be able to go on. 


	4. Chapter Four

Dixie sat behind the steering wheel of her car. With Tad still in the hospital after about two and a half weeks, she wasn't about to give up hope. She would sit with him for hours, just talking about her hopes and dreams for them, but she didn't think it was doing any good. It was December 20th, and Tad was still not responding to anyone.  
  
As she pulled into a space in the hospital parking lot, she popped the trunk. Stepping out of the car, she walked to the trunk, pulled out a medium sized shopping bag and then made her way up to Tad's room.  
  
Walking through the quiet hospital, Dixie paused outside Tad's room before pushing the door open.  
  
"Hey, baby," Dixie said, walking up to his bed and placing the shopping bag down. "When's the last time someone came in to give you a shave? You're getting to look a little scruffy." Dixie laughed. "Ooo." Dixie went into the shopping bag. "I brought you a present. It's not spectacular." She pulled out a mini Christmas tree. "The little guy was pre- decorated, but... I put the star on top. Hopefully, we won't be here for Christmas, but I still wanted to put it out, so you could see it when you wake up." Dixie caressed his face. "It's a really pretty tree, Tad." Her sweet southern charm shined through. "I just know you'll love it."  
  
Dixie lightly kissed him. "Boy, I miss you kissing me." Dixie smiled. "I just know that right now, you're dreaming of some witty response to that. I would give anything to hear it." Dixie stood and paced back and forth a few times before sitting again. "The house is so empty now without you. Especially at night." Dixie rubbed his arm. "Sometimes, I wake up... and I look over where you should be and I could swear... sometimes, Tad, just for a split second, I could swear that you're there. I can almost feel you with me. I can hear you whispering in my ear." Dixie paused, laughing softly. "I sound crazy to you right?" Dixie pushed her hair behind her ears and smiled. "That's where you're supposed to tell me, 'No, Dixie, you're not crazy. That was me. I was there'." She paused. "Not likely, huh?" She paused again. "Yeah, I didn't think so." Dixie could feel her eyes watering. "Look what you're doing to me." She sniffled and wiped her eyes. "You have me blubbering like a baby. What's Junior going to say if I go home like this?"  
  
"I'd say you have every right to be upset." Dixie turned her head and saw JR standing in the doorway. "I got home from school and you weren't there, I figured this would be the place to look." JR said approaching her.  
  
"I thought I'd stop by for a while."  
  
"How is he?"  
  
"The same," Dixie said, leaning her head up against JR's hip as he stood next to her. "He's going to be fine though. We're shooting for Christmas, aren't we, Tad?" Dixie asked him.  
  
"I'm sure he'll be up way before that," JR assured her. There was silence for a moment. "I wanted to ask you, since you're going with Maria tomorrow... Colby wants me to help her buy some stuff for Liza, Mia, Stuart and Dad, for Christmas."  
  
"You can take Colby tomorrow, that's fine. I know I don't have to remind you."  
  
"I know," JR said. "Colby goes in the back seat with a seat belt. And I'll take my time getting there."  
  
Dixie nodded. "Then as long as it's OK with Liza, it's OK with me."  
  
"It's OK with Liza, as long as I have Colby home for dinner." JR paused. "Hey... mom. Don't worry. Before you know it, everything will be back to normal."  
  
"I know it will," Dixie said. "We'll all be back together and everything will be perfect again."  
  
"I told Jamie I'd help him out with some stuff over at Brooke's," JR said. "I'll be home for dinner." JR leaned down and kissed the top of Dixie's head. "Hang in there, mom."  
  
Dixie smiled. JR turned and left the room. "You hear that, Tad?" Dixie asked. "He's taking Colby Christmas shopping tomorrow." She paused. "Junior's been strong for me through this whole thing. He's been helping me... so much. But..." Dixie began crying and leaned her head down onto Tad's chest. "I need you, Tad. You have to come out of this. Please... I need you." 


	5. Chapter Five

Dixie paced back and forth. Her hand rested on the back of her neck. "Maybe it's not. It could be," she said. The doorbell rang and Dixie slowly made her way to the door.  
  
"Dixie," Maria Grey said. Dixie swung the door inward. "Hey. Are you ready to go?" Dixie walked back into the house. Maria followed her. "What is it?"  
  
"I'll let you know in about five more minutes," Dixie said as she sat.  
  
"Something's wrong?" Maria sat beside her. "Dixie, you're my best friend. You were the maid of honor at my wedding..."  
  
"I really shouldn't be fussing over this. I should be excited, right? But with Tad still in the hospital, I guess that's kind of overshadowing this whole thing."  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"It's just that I wish that Tad was here for this." She paused. "What if he never wakes up, Maria? What if Tad is in that hospital forever? What am I going to do?"  
  
"You've kept faith for so long," Maria said. "You can't give up on him now." Maria still had a questioning look on her face as Dixie stood and walked over to the bathroom. She disappeared for a moment and Maria spoke again. "Are you going to tell me what's going on or not?" there was silence. "Dixie? Are you OK?" There was still nothing. Maria knocked on the door. "Dixie?" When she still received no answer, Maria pushed the door inward. Dixie stood over the sink, leaning with her head in her left hand and something else, that Maria couldn't quite see, in her right. "What is it, Dixie?"  
  
Dixie looked over at Maria, wide eyed. "I'm pregnant." Dixie steadied herself by grabbing hold of the sink. "I think I'm going to pass out."  
  
Maria moved over to Dixie and helped her out to the sofa. "Easy," Maria said, helping Dixie to sit. "I'll go get you some water." Dixie took a deep breath as Maria went to the kitchen and brought back a glass of water. "Are you going to be OK?" Maria asked, handing her the glass.  
  
Dixie nodded. "This is just a little too much excitement for me to handle right now." Dixie paused. "Tad would be so excited. "She smiled. "He said one time... that if I ever told him I was pregnant he would be the happiest man in the world." Dixie paused. "You must remember Edmund's reaction when you told him you were pregnant with Maddie."  
  
"Of course I do," Maria said.  
  
"And it was one of the happiest moments of your life, and Edmund was more excited than a little kid locked overnight in a candy store." Maria nodded slightly. "What if I never get to se Tad's reaction?"  
  
"Dixie, stop talking like that."  
  
"Oh, Maria," Dixie cried. "I dreamed that when this day came it would be perfect. I would set up the candles, we'd have a gourmet meal, and after dinner, I would tell him. I could see it clearly from the day Tad and I first set eyes on eachother. I could picture the look on his face when I told him and the happiness we would share, raising our baby... together."  
  
"You can still have that," Maria told her. "You've been sitting in that hospital room everyday for weeks now. You can't tell me that..."  
  
"I can't do this anymore," Dixie cried. "I can't sit in the room and... expect him to open his eyes. I love Tad too much to see him like this." She paused, taking a deep breath and rubbing her eyes. "I tried to imagine what it would have been like if I was the one who was in the accident."  
  
"Tad wouldn't give up on you, Dixie. You know that." Maria sat, facing her. "I don't know what else to say. You two have gone through everything together."  
  
Dixie nodded. "I know. Tad... has been my everything. He's my knight in shining armor. Through everything with Junior and Adam. He saved me from it all. He's been understanding and compassionate and..."  
  
"Then I think there's only one logical choice," Maria said. "Don't you?"  
  
Dixie managed a weak smile. "Now I know why I keep you around," Dixie said, hugging Maria.  
  
"What are friends for, huh?" Maria grinned. She pulled away slowly and stood, looking down at Dixie. "So, mommy. What do you say I take you out to celebrate?"  
  
Dixie stood. "Sounds good to me."  
  
  
  
"Please, JR?" Colby begged as she tried to drag JR by the hand. "Please?"  
  
"Didn't you make your list already?" JR asked, letting her lead him.  
  
"But Uncle Stuart lets me talk to Santa anyway."  
  
"You want to eat lunch too, right?" Colby nodded. "OK." JR gave in. Colby jumped up and down excitedly. "Not long though. Just tell Santa what you want for Christmas and then we have to go. I promised I'd have you home  
  
early."  
  
Colby smiled and pulled JR along to wait in line to talk to Santa, who in JR's opinion didn't even look like a good fake. But if standing on the line made Colby happy, he was willing to do it, even if it meant humiliation in front of any number of his friends who could have been in the mall. Still though, JR covered his ground, looking just to be sure nobody he knew was around. Suddenly JR's stare stopped in one direction.  
  
"What are you looking at, JR?" Colby asked him.  
  
"Mom's here," JR said.  
  
"Mommy?" Colby asked him.  
  
"No, no. Dixie." JR quickly said. Colby didn't know Dixie as mom, only JR. There was no point in confusing her.  
  
Maria and Dixie walked on the other side of the mall. They were laughing and giggling as they stopped in front of Lacy's. "I know what we can do," Maria said. "Let's just go in there and pick out the most spectacular, amazing thing we can find. Edmund promised me that the Crystal Ball this year would be the best one yet. What do you say?"  
  
Dixie raised her eyebrows with a smile on her face. "Why not?" she said. Dixie raised her hand and wiped her forehead.  
  
"Are you OK?" Maria asked her.  
  
"Yeah." Dixie assured her. "I think it was something I ate at lunch. I'm fine."  
  
"You're sure?" Dixie nodded. "Whatever you say." Maria started into the store and Dixie followed right behind her. Everything seemed fine. Dixie and Maria started to pick up clothing, showing it off to eachother, when Dixie took hold of one of the clothing racks. "Dixie?" Maria said, concerned.  
  
"I'm OK," Dixie said, slowly loosening her grip. She couldn't. The room was spinning. "I need to sit down." Dixie let go of the rack and tried to make her way to a seat, but fell to the floor. Her eyes were glazed, and tiny beads of sweat rolled down her head.  
  
"Dixie?" Maria said. "Somebody call an ambulance!" She called. Dixie's eyes started to roll back in her head, all she could hear was Maria's voice. "Hold on there, Dixie, we've got help coming for you." And then here eyes shut.  
  
  
  
Dixie's eyes eased open. The lights were bright and reflective on the surfaces around her. She couldn't see much of anything, but it was what she heard that caught her attention.  
  
"Dixie?" the voice was familiar to her, but she couldn't focus on the face. "Hey, Dix." She felt a hand reach out and touch hers. "I'm right here, I'm not going to leave you."  
  
Dixie's eyes began to focus on the body sitting beside her. "Tad." Dixie said weakly. "Oh, Tad. I knew you'd come back to me." 


	6. Chapter Six

Everything around Dixie was fuzzy. Everything except for Tad. She could see him perfectly. "I knew you'd be here," Dixie said.  
  
"I couldn't leave you alone in this place," Tad said to her. "I know how much you hate it here."  
  
"I want to go home, Tad. Can't we go home now?"  
  
Tad's hands caressed Dixie's face. "Soon, baby," he said. "It's not time yet."  
  
"But."  
  
Tad put his finger up to his mouth. "It's not worth arguing, Dix. We'd both get upset and I'd end up winning anyway."  
  
Dixie smiled weakly. "That's not true."  
  
"Nice try." Tad smiled back.  
  
"It was worth a shot," Dixie said.  
  
"What, you want to start an argument with me?"  
  
"I don't like the arguing," Dixie said. "It's the making up afterwards that I look forward to."  
  
"Oh. so that's what all those pointless arguments were about."  
  
"You never complained."  
  
"And I'm not now."  
  
"So then when can we go home?"  
  
As soon as the doctors say we can go home."  
  
"Oh, Tad." Dixie whined.  
  
"Don't 'Oh Tad' me." He shook his head, smiling. "You need to rest." Dixie put on a pout that a child of five might have. "Close your eyes. Go on." Dixie reluctantly gave in. Automatically, she felt herself grow tired. As she began to drift into sleep, Tad whispered in her ear. "I love you, Dix. Know that I love you."  
  
"Here she is, she's coming back to us. Dixie? Dixie, can you hear me?"  
  
Dixie couldn't quite focus. "Tad?" she said.  
  
"No, it's Jake." he said as the surroundings came into focus. "Do you know where you are?"  
  
Dixie looked around the room. "Where's Tad?" she asked. "He was here, Jake."  
  
"We've been here with you the whole time, Dixie. Tad is still in his room. Remember?"  
  
"We were in Lacy's," Maria said. "You passed out."  
  
Dixie nodded faintly. "The baby," she looked at Jake. "Is the baby..."  
  
"Easy, Dixie," Jake said. "Maria told me. The baby is fine."  
  
There was silence for a moment as Maria looked at Jake. "Can I talk to her alone for a minute?" Maria asked.  
  
"Yeah," Jake said. "Page me if you need anything, OK?" Maria nodded. "Get some rest, Dixie, alright?"  
  
Jake left the room and Maria sat down beside Dixie. "I saw your labs," Maria said. "You didn't say anything about stress being an issue."  
  
"Jake said that as long as I took it easy I would be fine," Dixie said.  
  
"That's not what he told me. Dixie, listen, I know you're worried about Tad. But you're putting your life at risk. You're going to really hurt yourself."  
  
"I'm fine, Maria. Really."  
  
"You shouldn't worry about convincing me. JR was in the mall today."  
  
"Junior knows about this?"  
  
"We had him bring Colby home." she paused. "This is a lot for a teenager to handle. First Tad, and now you. You're important to him." Dixie stared up at the ceiling. "He said he'd be back after Colby was home."  
  
"I feel terrible," Dixie said. "How could I do this to him?"  
  
"Hold on now. I never said that you did anything to him."  
  
"But I did. He has to stay with Adam now that both me and Tad are in the hospital. We did everything to keep Junior away from Adam..."  
  
"Dixie... Dixie..." Maria tried to calm her. "JR can stay at Wildwind for the next few days. Edmund and I would be glad to have him."  
  
"I can't ask you to do that."  
  
"You didn't ask. I offered. You can't say no."  
  
Dixie smiled. "Thank you. Thank you for doing this for him." Maria was silent. "Can I ask you a favor?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
"I want you to look at Tad for me. If there's anyone who's perfect to check him, it's you."  
  
Maria nodded. "I'll see if Jake will let me take a look. I'm sure he won't mind."  
  
"How am I ever going to repay you for this?" Dixie asked.  
  
"Just get better," Maria told her. "We'll worry about everything else after we're sure that you and the baby are OK. Now... I'd better get out of here and let you rest before JR comes back."  
  
"Could you send him right in when he does?"  
  
Maria nodded. "Now try to relax. I'll see you later."  
  
Maria left the room. Dixie turned her head to the side and looked out the window. It was still bright outside as Dixie laid there. the room was silent. Too silent. She could hear the wall clock ticking and couldn't blank the sound out of her mind.  
  
As Dixie turned her head back and stared at the ceiling again, she put her hand on her belly. "I love you too, Tad," she said, moving her hand in a circular motion. "I love you too." 


	7. Chapter Seven

"Don't you want to play with us?" Sam Grey asked JR as he paused a moment with a model airplane in his hand. Maddie ran up beside him. "You can use my plane."  
  
"JR?" Maddie asked him. "Doesn't Santa come to your house?"  
  
Maria and Edmund entered the room where the kids were playing. "We talked about this, Maddie," Maria said, hearing the little girl's question. "Santa's going to bring JR his presents later because his mommy and daddy are sick."  
  
"I know," Maddie said. Edmund walked up behind his son and daughter. "Can you play with us, daddy?"  
  
"I'll tell you what," Edmund said. "Why don't you and your brother run upstairs and I'll be there in a little while to play with you." the children smiled from ear to ear and raced eachother upstairs.  
  
JR was silent. "I'm sorry that we couldn't make your Christmas a little merrier," Maria said to him.  
  
"I just wish that mom was here," JR said. Maria wished that there was something else that she could do for JR. It was hard for him to be away from his family on the holidays. "I bought Colby a Christmas present," JR said, standing. "I'm going to go bring it over to her and then I think I'll go see mom for a little while."  
  
"Do you need a ride over there?"  
  
"No. I've got my car. I'll be back later." Maria nodded as JR walked to the front door and grabbed his coat.  
  
Edmund approached her and Maria put her arms around his waist. "I wish there was something else I could do for him," she said.  
  
Edmund kissed the top of her head. "We're doing everything possible,"  
  
he said.  
  
"He should have his family..."  
  
"You can't move the world, Maria. You've done everything for Dixie you can. You've been the perfect friend."  
  
"Even with Tad," Maria said. "I'm a doctor, Edmund. That's what I do. I take sick people and make them better. But I ran tests on Tad..."  
  
"You're blaming yourself that he's still in a coma?" Edmund looked Maria in the eye. "You know you can't lay that on your shoulders."  
  
"I know," Maria said. "It's just that I feel so... helpless. Not as helpless as Dixie must feel. I don't even want to imagine what she's going through. If something like this had happened to us, I don't think I'd be able to..."  
  
"Don't think about it," Edmund said, pulling Maria's head into his chest. "Don't breath another word about it."  
  
"She's falling, Edmund," Maria said. "And I'm afraid of what's going to happen when she finally hits the ground."  
  
  
  
JR stepped into the main room of the Chandler mansion, carrying a small, simply wrapped, odd shaped package.  
  
"JR!" Colby yelled as she spotted her brother. "Look what Santa brought me."  
  
"Wow," JR said, acting surprised. "Here." he handed her the gift. "I bought you a present." Colby ripped at the paper, revealing a pink stuffed rabbit.  
  
"A bunny!" She wrapped her arms around JR's leg. "Thanks, JR." Colby ran back over and sat on the floor, playing with the rabbit.  
  
JR stood and watched her as Liza walked up behind him. "How are Tad and your mom?" she asked.  
  
"Mom's doing better. Tad's got her all worked up. It's a stress thing," JR said. "I'm going to see her, I just wanted to bring Colby her gift."  
  
"It was thoughtful of you."  
  
"She saw it in the toy store window. It's not like it took a lot of thought. But it makes Colby happy."  
  
"Where's daddy?" Colby asked Liza. "I want to show him my bunny."  
  
"Daddy will be back in a little while, honey."  
  
"Where did he go?" JR asked, almost uninterested.  
  
"He didn't say," Liza said. "He just said he had something to take care of and that he'd be back later."  
  
"Figures he's leave his family on Christmas."  
  
"JR, play with me," Colby begged. "Just 'til Uncle Stuart gets here. Please."  
  
JR checked his wristwatch. A little while wouldn't hurt him. And like he had said before, it would make Colby happy. He walked up to his little sister and sat her in his lap. "Let's see what you've got here," he said.  
  
  
  
"Sir!" A nurse ran after a man in a suit, walking through the second floor of the hospital. "Excuse me, sir! Do you have clearance to be..." The man turned around. "Mr. Chandler," she said in shock. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize... Do you need me to show you to a room?"  
  
"No," Adam said. "I know where to go." Adam walked away from the nurse and continued down the hall and stopped in front of a room. He pushed his way inside.  
  
"You look...well," Adam said.  
  
Dixie pushed herself up in bed. "Adam," she said, surprised. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"I heard that you were back in the hospital...  
  
"...And you thought that you would pop in?"  
  
"You're the mother of my son, Dixie," Adam said. "Of course I'm going to make sure that you're OK."  
  
"Next, you're going to tell me that you still love me and that you were wrong and that me being locked in a padded room at Laurel Hill was all a mistake."  
  
"Well, I wouldn't go that far," Adam said.  
  
"What the hell are you doing here?" Adam spun around and saw JR coming towards him.  
  
"Junior, please," Dixie begged, fearing that JR might do something crazy.  
  
"You don't need his sympathy, Mom," JR said. "You don't have to lay there and let him feed you some bull story about how he's sorry about what's going on."  
  
"Junior."  
  
"What are you trying to do to her, Dad? Huh? Why don't you just leave her alone? Go home to Colby."  
  
"Go home, Adam," Dixie said, slouching back down in bed. "Go spend Christmas with your wife and daughter."  
  
Shot down, Adam turned from Dixie. Very uncharacteristic of Adam Chandler. Dixie knew that she hadn't seen the last of him. JR sat down beside Dixie's bed after Adam left the room.  
  
"You don't have to act like that around him," Dixie said.  
  
"He doesn't have the right to treat you the way he does."  
  
"That's just the way your father is."  
  
"A cold hearted son of a ..."  
  
"Junior!"  
  
"I'm sorry mom," JR said. He paused. "I don't know how you have so much patience around him."  
  
"Let's not talk about Adam anymore, OK?" Dixie asked.  
  
JR nodded. "How are you feeling?"  
  
"Jake's actually letting me move around a little on my own now," Dixie said, stretching. Down the hall a little... to go see Tad." JR could see the pain start to show on Dixie's face and took her hand. There they sat, mother and son, comforting eachother silently.  
  
  
  
Dixie practically tiptoed down the hallway and pushed her way into Tad's room. The moon was shining through the window as she sat down on the bed beside him.  
  
"You know I had to come back tonight," Dixie said. "It wouldn't be Christmas if we didn't get to wish on our star, would it?" Dixie leaned her head back. "Look, you've got the perfect view out your window. See?" She paused. "I think I know what we would both wish for tonight. It's a wish for you, Tad. I wish that... you would get better." She took his hand and placed it on her belly. "And I wish that you could feel the happiness that I do with our baby." Dixie felt a single tear roll down her cheek. "Merry Christmas, Tad." 


	8. Chapter Eight

"I appreciate you doing this, Brooke," Dixie said as she took a seat on the sofa.  
  
"Well, you shouldn't be alone at a time like this," Brooke said. "Besides, I have the extra space. Jamie will like to spend some time with JR. They could work on their soccer."  
  
"I really would like to help you around here..."  
  
"No, no. I got specific orders from Jake, for you to relax. No strenuous work or a lot of time on your feet."  
  
"I do get to go to the hospital," Dixie said.  
  
"I didn't say you were a prisoner in this house," Brooke said. "Just that you have to be careful. The baby..."  
  
Dixie put her hand down on her now swollen belly. "We waited years for this," Dixie said. "Tad... we wanted more than anything to have a baby." she paused. "there's nothing in the world that I would do to hurt this child." Dixie sniffled. "I think I need to take a walk."  
  
"Dixie..." Brooke said. "You shouldn't be..."  
  
"Don't worry," Dixie assured her. "I feel fine. I won't be long, I just need to get a little air."  
  
"If you think you can handle it."  
  
"I can handle it." Dixie assured her. "I'm just going to go sit in the park for a while. I'll be off my feet." Dixie held up her hand. "I swear."  
  
"Just, please take it easy, Dixie," Brooke begged.  
  
Dixie nodded and left the house. She started towards the park. It was a pretty lengthy walk, but she paused every so often along the way.  
  
The day was unusually warm for February. Dixie didn't even carry a jacket, there was no need. She took a seat on the park bench and rested her hand on her abdomen. She really wasn't paying attention to anything, and just let her mind wander until she felt some extra weight push down on the bench beside her.  
  
"I wasn't expecting to see you here," Dixie said.  
  
"Likewise," Adam said looking over at her. There was silence for a moment.  
  
"Was there something you wanted, Adam?"  
  
"This was still a public park last time I checked."  
  
Dixie was silent. Both she and Adam kept a forward stare. It was awkward for her to be sitting there with her ex-husband.  
  
"So..." Dixie asked. "What are you doing sitting in the park in the middle of the day?"  
  
"Is it against the law all of a sudden to be here?"  
  
"I'm not looking for an argument, Adam," Dixie said. "Just trying to... strike up conversation."  
  
Adam paused. "Liza..." he started. "She's helping to get he house set up..."  
  
"Are you hosting a party?"  
  
"A fundraiser," Adam said.  
  
"Ah."  
  
"What, ah? What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"What's in this for you, Adam?" Dixie asked him. "I've never known you to do anything if you weren't getting something out of it."  
  
"This is strictly professional," Adam said.  
  
"Strictly, I'm sure." Dixie paused. "It's none of my business anyway."  
  
"Actually, I was hoping you would attend. With JR, of course."  
  
Dixie bit her bottom lip. "Adam, I really don't know if that's a good idea..." she trailed off. "I mean with Tad in the hospital... and Junior... he's still taking this all kind of hard."  
  
"He's my son too, Dixie." Adam grew louder, causing Dixie to back away from him slightly. Adam ran his hands over his face. "It's a charity event," Adam started again in a calmer tone. "I would like for my son to be there."  
  
Dixie bent over a little, resting her arms on her knees, and turned to face him. "I can't make him go," she said. "He's old enough now to make his own decisions about these things." Adam was silent, mimicking her position. Dixie sighed. The look of innocence on Adam's face could have melted anyone's heart. "Fine," she said, causing Adam to sit erect. "I'll mention it to him."  
  
"Dixie," Adam said, reaching for her hands, but Dixie quickly pulled them away. Adam nodded and stood.  
  
As he walked away from the bench, Dixie stood and called to him. "Adam." Adam remained with his back towards her for a moment before he turned around. "I'm not guarantying anything." Adam was silent, just nodding, before turning again and walking away from her.  
  
Dixie sat back down. She considered long and hard whether or not to even mention the event to JR. She didn't know what it was, but something told her that Adam was up to no good, as usual. But there was also something that was calling her to attend. She wasn't quite sure what it was, but it was there, and she had to follow it.  
  
  
  
"I'm not going!" JR yelled as he started upstairs in Brooke's house. Dixie followed him.  
  
"Junior," she said. "Will you please consider this? All you have to do is go. you don't have to be seen around with anybody. Your father..."  
  
"Don't you get it, Mom?" JR said. "I don't want to go to this...stupid party. Not after everything he's done to you."  
  
"If I can put that aside for one night, don't you think you can do the same thing?" She paused and took his hands. "I'm not going as his date, I'm going because this is for a good cause." JR's shoulders fell. "I know that you're old enough to decide on your own what you want to do. But whether you go or not... I am." Dixie began to tug on his heart strings. "Now if you want me to go alone..."  
  
"OK," JR gave in. "Fine, I'll go. But not for him. For you. Somebody has to make sure you don't party to hard."  
  
Dixie embraced her son. "Thank you," she said. "We'll have a good time. Both of us. I promise." 


	9. Chapter Nine

"I'm not sure that this whole party is a good idea," Maria said as she helped Dixie zip up her dress. "You really shouldn't be on your feet for that long."  
  
"I'm sure that the Chandler Mansion still has chairs," Dixie said. "Besides, I don't plan on staying too long. Just long enough to make an appearance and have Adam see Junior."  
  
"He's OK with this... your son?"  
  
"He agreed to come. Jamie's going to be there with Brooke, so at least he has somebody..."  
  
"Can you breath alright in that, or should we look for something else?" Maria asked.  
  
Dixie ran her hands down her sides, flattening out the dress. "It feels great," Dixie said. "How does it look?"  
  
Maria stood back, looking at Dixie in the blue strapless dress. "It's totally you," Maria smiled. "I'm glad it could go to good use again. I haven't worn it since I was pregnant with Maddie." Dixie sat down on the edge of the bed. "Are you sure you're going to be OK tonight?" Maria asked. "It's been a long time since you've been in that place."  
  
Dixie nodded. "I'll be fine. If it gets awkward, I'll just leave." Dixie put her hands on Maria's shoulders. "I'll be fine."  
  
  
  
Dixie and JR stood outside the Chandler Mansion. Winifred swung the doors inward and Dixie entered with her arm linked with JR's.  
  
"This isn't right," JR said to her as they walked into the main room. "You don't owe him, Mom."  
  
"I know that," Dixie said. "Just try to have a good time, Junior. Please."  
  
"I don't know how you can even think about having a good time here. Especially with Tad in the hospital..."  
  
"That's enough," Dixie said. "Enough." JR stood there silently. His eyes practically slits as he took a deep breath and walked away from his mother. Dixie paused a moment before walking further into the room. She spotted Liza and approached her.  
  
"Liza," Dixie said. Liza looked up. "The house looks fantastic."  
  
"Oh," Liza said. "I really can't take the credit. I just helped to think up some of the design."  
  
"Well, it's beautiful," Dixie said.  
  
Liza smiled and looked at Dixie. "And look at you," she said. "I guess congratulations are in order."  
  
Dixie smiled, practically blushing. "Thank You."  
  
Liza sipped her champagne as Adam came up behind her. "How's Tad?" she asked.  
  
"No change," Dixie said. "We're just working on taking it one day at a time now... and hoping for the best."  
  
"That's all you can do," Liza said.  
  
Dixie attempted to smile as she put her hand down on her belly. She closed her eyes briefly, taking a deep breath. She felt the tears start to well up in her eyes. "I'm sorry," she said. "Excuse me."  
  
Dixie rushed away from them and out the front door. Adam turned to Liza. "I'll go," he said.  
  
Adam followed Dixie all the way out to the boathouse. She was sitting with her head resting up against a wall, her eyes closed. She heard Adam approach and opened her eyes, looking over at him.  
  
"This really isn't a good place for us to be alone together," Dixie said as Adam took a seat beside her.  
  
"Why?" Adam asked. "Brings back memories?"  
  
"Is that why you followed me out here, Adam?" Dixie asked. "To... reminisce about days passed?"  
  
"Give me a break, Dixie," Adam said. "Alright? I'm human to. I'm allowed to be concerned."  
  
Dixie laughed softly. "Concerned? For who? Me or you?"  
  
"You, of course."  
  
"Doesn't that sound familiar?" Dixie paused. "Look, Adam, I'm fine. Go on back to your guests." Dixie stood, only to grow dizzy and fall back down on to the bench.  
  
Adam reached his arms out to steady her. "You call that fine?" he asked.  
  
"I just got a rush," Dixie said. "It'll pass."  
  
"Maybe I should call somebody."  
  
"No. I'm OK." Dixie looked into Adam's eyes. "Am I noticing a soft spot?" She smiled, punching him lightly on the chest. "I knew you were a softy. Liza's really getting to you, isn't she?" Dixie asked as Adam slowly started moving closer to her. "What?"  
  
"Nothing," Adam said, a devilish look on his face as he continued towards her.  
  
Dixie stood, realizing his motives. "No," she said. "No way am I going to be the reason your marriage falls apart. Not again." Adam stood and walked toward her without saying a word. "Be sure to tell Liza I said good night."  
  
Adam watched as Dixie rushed away from the boathouse. Making a fist, he pounded it into one of the wooden support beams and then paused a moment before running his fingers back through his silver hair. Taking a deep breath, he straightened his jacket and started back toward the main house. 


	10. Chapter Ten

Dixie sat at Tad's bedside, twisting her fingers with his. "Nothing happened, baby," she said to him. "He wanted it to, I know he did, but I would never do something like that to you. Especially not now." Dixie paused and ran her fingers back through his hair. She then took his hand and placed it gently on her belly. "We waited for this for so long, Tad," she said. "A baby. A tiny little person, who's going to have... your personality and my smile. Or... if it's a little boy, your rakish good looks." She laughed before growing serious again. "I know how bad you wanted this. How can you miss it? How can you lay there and not open your eyes?" Dixie paused. "I've been here everyday since the beginning of December... It's almost March. It's been almost three months." The tears began to flow down her cheeks. "I can't take this anymore, Tad. I can't do this on my own. I need you to get through it. I need you to be here with me when this baby is born. I want you to... be able to hold your son or daughter. I want you to be... the proudest daddy in Pine Valley. The kind like in those old TV shows we used to catch the ends of while lying in bed at night. Pushing the baby's carriage through the park... chin held high," she laughed, wiping the tears from her eyes. "Don't you want that?" She rested her head down on his chest.  
  
Out of the corner of her eye, Dixie saw one of the monitors spike. Her head shot up and she jumped to her feet, rushing to the door. "Hey!" she called down the hallway. "Jake!" she saw him standing at the nurses station. "Get over here, quick!"  
  
Jake dropped his files and ran to Tad's room. "What is it, Dixie?" he asked, putting his stethoscope around his neck.  
  
"I... I don't know. I was sitting here, just talking to him and this thing here beeped and the top line," she said pointing. "This one here, went way up."  
  
Jake took a look, taking Dixie's hand. "It's alright, Dixie," he said. "It's OK, calm down."  
  
"Is he OK?" Dixie choked, her lip quivering as Jake checked Tad's pulse and vitals.  
  
"OK?" Jake said. "This is better than OK, Dixie. This is wonderful." Dixie's jaw dropped slightly, questioning Jake. "He's responding. He's finally responding to you."  
  
"Then he really does know that I'm here?" Dixie's smile grew, her tears turned to tears of joy. "And he heard what I said?"  
  
"I'm assuming every word." Dixie sat back down beside Tad, taking his hand again in hers. "Boy you sure do know how to pick the meaty conversations," she said to him, recalling that she had told him about the advances Adam Chandler had made towards her at the party. She looked back up at Jake. "Does this mean he'll be waking up soon?" she asked.  
  
Jake took a deep breath. "I don't want to jump to any conclusions, Dixie," he said. "I'll get the neurologist to take a look at him."  
  
"Could you have Maria do it?" Dixie asked him. "Jake, please?"  
  
"I'll ask her," Jake said, walking up to Dixie and putting his fingers on her neck, checking her pulse. "You're feeling alright?"  
  
"Just excited," Dixie smiled as Jake took his stethoscope and began examining her. "What is it?"  
  
"You're sure you're feeling OK?" Dixie nodded. "Honestly, Dixie. You haven't been, tired... nauseous, faint..."  
  
"Sure," Dixie admitted. "It's called pregnancy." she paused. "Right?" Jake continued to listen to her chest. "Jake, you're scaring me."  
  
"I'd like to put you in a room over night."  
  
"I just got out of here, what's wrong?" Jake was silent. "Just tell me, please."  
  
"I'm concerned about your heart."  
  
Dixie's eyes widened. "What about my heart? The pericardia?"  
  
"It may be nothing," Jake said. "I just want to be cautious."  
  
Dixie pursed her lips. her eyes watered. "OK," she said. She stood, moving to the head of Tad's bed. She bent down and kissed his forehead. She then walked back over to Jake.  
  
Jake put his arm around her shoulder and began to lead her out of the room when Dixie stopped and burst into tears, throwing her arms around his waist. "What's happening?" Dixie cried. "Everything was fine. I was fine, Tad was fine. Our life was perfect. But then everything just... turned around. Now, tad's lying there in a coma. This whole thing gives me stress and plants me in here." Dixie paused and wiped her eyes. "Then I found out I was pregnant.... my husband's still in the hospital. I collapse again. It may be my heart, it may not be. I'm told to take it easy, I do. Time goes by, still no change... I go to a charity ball where my ex-husband attempts to seduce me. Only to come back here, to learn that Tad just might be getting better. At last, a tiny glimmer of hope. But now... my heart again." Dixie moved her hand quickly down to her belly. She closes her eyes, briefly and takes a deep breath. "I can't take this anymore, Jake. I can't..." Dixie cringed, tightening her grip on Jake's arm. Her knees gave out beneath her and Jake quickly kept her from hitting the floor.  
  
Jake managed to get the door open a crack. "Hey," he called. "Get a gurney in here! Hurry!" 


	11. Chapter Eleven

Dixie's eyes fluttered. She took a deep breath as she opened them. The room was a blur of mixing, spinning colors, no one in specific that she could focus on. Dixie moaned softly. The voices around her were muddled. She couldn't pinpoint from where exactly in the room each was coming from, or whether it was a male or female.  
  
"What did I do?" Dixie managed to say in a breathy whisper. The colors and figures began to become more noticeable. "I did this, it's my fault."  
  
JR sat at her bedside. He took her hand as he looked up at Jake. "What is she talking about?" he asked. "What did she do?"  
  
Jake just shook his head. "the medication must be wearing off," Jake said. "Dixie?" Jake checked her pulse. "How are you feeling?"  
  
"Jake?" she said. "What... what happened?"  
  
"The baby..."  
  
"Oh, my God, the baby," Dixie said. "Jake, please tell me the baby's OK."  
  
"The baby's OK, Dixie," Jake said. "We checked you out. With your heart condition and your pregnancy... The baby is draining a lot from you."  
  
"But everything's OK?"  
  
"Dixie," Jake said. "You're going through way too much right now. When you collapsed before, I have to be honest with you... I thought you were going to lose the baby."  
  
"But I didn't."  
  
"No," Jake paused. "Dixie, I don't want to have to keep you here again, but I don't think I have much of a choice."  
  
"Oh, Jake," Dixie moaned. "You can't keep me here, I hate this place."  
  
"It's either you stay here... or you can go home. But... you need to rest," he paused. "A lot of rest."  
  
"I'd rather rest at home," Dixie said. "No running around. I'll take it easy. I swear."  
  
"I'll make sure she stays off her feet," JR said.  
  
Jake nodded. "You listen to your son, Dixie," Jake said.  
  
"Will do, doc." Dixie managed a smile.  
  
"I'll go see what I can do about your paperwork." He headed for the door. "Don't stay too long, JR, OK?" I want your mom to get some rest."  
  
"No problem," JR said. Jake left the room and Dixie looked back over at her son. "You really scared me," JR admitted to her.  
  
"I'm sorry, sweetheart," Dixie said.  
  
"I just... ever since the party you haven't seemed... you know." Dixie lifted her hand and cupped JR's cheek. "What happened mom?"  
  
"Nothing," Dixie said. "Please... Junior. Just drop this." JR looked at her, his eyebrows drawn close together in thought. His mouth gaped slightly as he stood. "Junior," Dixie said as he started for the door. "Junior, where are you... Junior." JR walked out of the room and closed the door.  
  
  
  
He just sat there. He sat in the driver's seat, his hands on the steering wheel, the motor idling. Sooner or later, he knew the driver would pull away. They would be alone. That's exactly what he wanted.  
  
He waited patiently for the car to pull away before shutting his own off and stepping out. He went unseen as he made his way further into the park.  
  
The park was the perfect place. He knew that other people would be around to jump in if things got out of control, but that wouldn't prevent him from doing what he had to do.  
  
Adam was siting on a bench, a small stack of manila envelopes sitting beside him as JR approached.  
  
"Working out of the office today?" JR said as Adam looked up at him. "You mean sunshine and fresh air aren't below the great Adam Chandler?"  
  
"Is there somewhere this animosity is coming from?" Adam asked. "Because frankly, JR..."  
  
"What the hell did you do to her?" JR screamed.  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about," Adam said. "I haven't done..."  
  
"She's in the hospital again. Did you know that? Mom's in the hospital again and it's because of you!"  
  
"Dixie?" Adam stood.  
  
"You know, Dad. I don't know why you think you need to destroy her life... when she's done nothing but show you.... kindness and understanding, even after you treated her like dirt!" JR stood directly in his view. "I don't know what your angle is."  
  
"I don't have an... angle," Adam said. "I want what's best for my family."  
  
"She's not your family!" JR's voice raised again. "Not anymore." he paused. "And if I had my way, I wouldn't be either." Adam was hit below the belt. He was speechless. "You think I asked to be born Adam Chandler Junior? I didn't ask for this. I don't want it! I don't ever want to be you! Ever!"  
  
"Don't you dare talk to me like that," Adam said. "I'm still your father."  
  
"I may have your name," JR said coldly, "but you're not my father." Adam sank back. His children were his life and now he was standing there losing one. JR slowly backed away from him. "Stay out of our lives. Stay away from her... and stay away from me!" Adam was speechless as JR turned and stormed back to his car. He fell back onto the bench, partly shocked and partly surprised as JR's car sped away. 


	12. Chapter Twelve

Dixie sat back on the sofa, with the windows open, in attempt to cool the unusually warm house. It was an amazing stretch of weather that they were facing for mid-March. It might have just turned spring, but it felt like a summer day. Dixie had the television on, fanning herself as the doorbell rang.  
  
"One minute!" she called, trying to get up. "Maybe two minutes." Dixie got to her feet, putting her hands on her lower back as she made her way to the door. It seemed to Dixie that the baby had grown extremely quickly, recently. She had just reached her sixth month, but she looked as if she would give birth at any minute. She made it to the door and eased it inward.  
  
"Edmund," she said, moving aside. "Come on in." Dixie made her way back to the sofa, sitting slowly.  
  
Edmund approached her. "How are you feeling?"  
  
"Like I swallowed a watermelon."  
  
Edmund smiled. "You've been through this before with JR," Edmund said. "So at least you know what to expect."  
  
"Except... when I was pregnant with Junior, I was allowed to leave the house." She paused. "So..." she said. "Are you on lunch or something?"  
  
"No, I took the rest of the day off. I thought you might like some company until the kids get out of school."  
  
Dixie smiled. "I would really like that." she paused. "We can't do much though."  
  
Edmund sat beside her. "Well, you were watching TV, we could do that."  
  
"I never took you as the soap opera type, " she said.  
  
"Well, I'll give them a try," he said. "Just clue me in as to what's going on."  
  
Dixie sat up straight, putting her hand on her belly as she moved closer to Edmund. "OK," she said. "That woman is sleeping with her husband's brother, who's engaged to her sister and he's just about to walk in on them."  
  
"The brother?"  
  
"No, the husband." Dixie sighed. "Just watch, you'll catch on."  
  
Edmund sat there, through a few of the shows, trying to follow what was going on, but for the life of him, just couldn't. "I don't know how you do it." Edmund looked at her.  
  
"Do what?" Dixie asked.  
  
"Watch these things."  
  
Dixie laughed. "You know, Tad said the same thing," she said. "I happen to think they're entertaining."  
  
"Entertaining, that's for sure," Edmund said. Dixie took a hold of the arm of the sofa to stand. "Do you need something?"  
  
"I can get it," Dixie said. "I'm fine."  
  
"No, no." Edmund stood. "You just sit and relax. I'll get it. What do you need?"  
  
"You don't have to..."  
  
"I want to." Edmund smiled.  
  
Dixie did the same, leaning back. "I just want to get some water." Edmund walked into the kitchen. "The glasses are in the cabinet above the sink!" she called. "And you can just help yourself to anything in there. I think I might have some Oreos in the cookie jar."  
  
After a moment, Edmund came out of the kitchen and handed Dixie a glass. "Why is the creme in these Oreos green?" he asked her.  
  
"They're those new spring colors," Dixie laughed. "You mean Maddie hasn't attacked you to get them yet?"  
  
"I'll have to be prepared, I guess," Dixie smiled, placing the glass down and then attempting to stand again. "Dixie, I said I'd get anything..."  
  
"I really don't think you'd be able to help me in this department." Dixie raised her eyebrows. "Just wait here, have a few more of those Oreos. I'll be out in a minute." Dixie slowly made her way out of the room and Edmund sat back. He twisted the Oreo apart, looking down at it.  
  
"Green creme." Edmund said. "What will they come up with next?"  
  
"Mom!" JR called as he opened the front door. "I'm ho.."  
  
Edmund stood from the sofa. "JR." he said.  
  
"Where's my mom?" JR asked. At that moment, Dixie walked back in. "Hi, sweetie," she said.  
  
"I think I should get going," Edmund said. "Sam and Maddie." Edmund headed for the front door. "Dixie, if you need anything..."  
  
"Thanks, Edmund." Dixie smiled. She sat back down on the sofa as Edmund left the house. JR approached her. "How was school?"  
  
JR nodded. "What was he doing here?"  
  
"Just checking in," Dixie said. "It gets kind of lonely just sitting here doing nothing all day. He kept me company for a few hours. We watched some TV."  
  
"Well how are you feeling?" JR asked. "Don't you have an appointment at the hospital today?"  
  
Dixie checked the clock. "Good thing you reminded me," she said. "I completely forgot." Dixie tried standing again. JR jumped up and helped her to her feet.  
  
"I can drive you down there," he said. "I want to go with you."  
  
Dixie smiled. "OK," she said. "I don't think I can fit behind the steering wheel anyway."  
  
"I can go see Tad while they look at you."  
  
"that would be nice. I'm sure he'd like to hear your voice."  
  
JR smiled softly as he took Dixie's arm. "Come on," he said. "I don't want you to be late." 


	13. Chapter Thirteen

JR slowly pushed his way into Tad's hospital room, shutting the door and walking up to his bed. "Hey," JR said as he took a seat. "I uh... brought mom to get the baby checked and just figured I'd pop in... say hi." He paused. "I know she hasn't been around to see you lately, but she's had to stay home and rest. Jake's worried that if she doesn't, she might lose the baby. Don't worry though, Tad. I'm watching out for her. She's doing pretty good considering what she's dealing with..." he paused again. "They told me that you can hear what I'm saying, and they told me that you responded to mom and the baby...." JR sniffled. "So... listen to me now. She needs you to be there for her when my little brother or sister is born. It would break her heart if you weren't." JR rubbed his eyes. "I know how much you love her, Tad. And I know how much she loves you. You have to be there for her for this." JR shook his head, standing. "I sound like an idiot," he said outloud to himself. "Talking to you like you're going to miraculously answer me. Like after three months you're just going to open your eyes. Faith," JR laughed. "Mom may have it, but I think I've just about given up." JR walked toward the door and reached for the doorknob as he heard it.  
  
A deep breath, it was almost a groan, like when you just wake up in the morning. JR's eyes widened as he walked back over to Tad's bedside. "Tad?" he said. Tad's eyes were slits, opening slightly. "Oh my God," JR said, running back to the door and opening it. "Hey!" he called. "Hey! Somebody get down here! I think he's waking up!"  
  
In the room next door, Jake was looking at Dixie. At the sound of JR's calls, they glanced at eachother. "Junior..." Dixie said. "Tad's awake?!" Dixie tried to pick herself up off the table.  
  
"Easy, Dixie," Jake said as he helped her. "We'll go see, OK?" he slowly led her to the door and over to Tad's room. JR was waiting at the door. He took Dixie's arm as Jake went over to check Tad. "Tad?" Jake said. Tad's eyes were heavy, but open. "Can you hear me?" Tad opened his mouth to speak, but instead weakly nodded his head. Jake motioned for JR and Dixie to come closer to the bed. "Do you know who this is?" Jake motioned towards Dixie. "Do you remember her name?"  
  
Dixie's bottom lip quivered and her eyes filled with tears at the sight of Tad awake. "Do you remember me, Tad?" she asked.  
  
"Dixie?" Tad managed to say. He had a tiny smile on his face. "I got the pens."  
  
Dixie brought her hands up to her mouth as the tears streamed down her face. "You remember," she cried. "You remember what happened?"  
  
Tad closed his eyes and took a deep breath, nodding slightly. "I slid... on the ice," he said. "I couldn't stop... I saw the tree and... everything went black."  
  
"But you're OK now." She took his hand. "Everything's going to be fine now." Dixie swallowed, beginning to breath heavily.  
  
"Take it easy, Dixie," Jake reminded her. "JR, why don't you help her outside? Let her get some fresh air." Dixie was reluctant to go with her son. "Go on, Dixie," Jake said. "I need to take a look at Tad anyway. Go with JR."  
  
JR helped Dixie out of the room. She was still having a bit of difficulty catching her breath. JR began to grow more nervous. "Are you OK, Mom?" he asked as they paused outside the elevator.  
  
Dixie closed her eyes, moving aside and easing herself down on to a chair. She lightly shook her head, moving her hand to her belly. "Go get Jake," she said.  
  
JR's eyes widened as he left her and ran back to Tad's room. Jake could see the fear in JR's eyes. "Where is she?" Jake asked.  
  
"By the elevator."  
  
"Stay here with him," Jake said before hurrying out of the room, over to Dixie. He kneeled down in front of her.  
  
Dixie looked at him, her skin was pale, her eyes watering, her breath still heaving. The pain was obvious in her face as she spoke. "Something's wrong." 


	14. Chapter Fourteen

"Take it easy, Dixie," Jake said. He had gotten his hands on an oxygen mask and held it gently to her face. She was still breathing heavily. "Try to take deep breaths, OK. Try." Dixie tried to catch her breath, but still couldn't. She had tears in her eyes. Jake took her hand. "Look at me, Dixie." Dixie looked into his eyes. "Does it hurt anywhere?" Dixie nodded and lifted her hand to her chest, leading the hand that Jake held to her belly. "Both places?" Dixie cringed. "OK, OK." Jake tried to help her to her feet and over to a wheelchair.  
  
"What... what's wrong?" Dixie said.  
  
"I think it's your heart." Jake admitted.  
  
"God, I feel like I'm going to die."  
  
"You're not going to die, Dixie. I will bring you down, we'll take some tests, we'll get to the bottom of this, alright?"  
  
"What about the baby? I can't lose the baby."  
  
"You're not going to lose the baby." Jake tried to calm her. The truth was, he didn't know whether or not the baby would live. He could only pray. "I need for you t stay calm for me though, OK?" Dixie nodded, still trying to steady her breath.  
  
She leaned her head back in pain. "Tad..." she said. "I want Tad." "We'll bring him in to see you, OK? After the tests."  
  
"No. Please, Jake... I need to see him... in case..."  
  
"Nothing is going to happen," Jake said. "you're going to be fine."" He pushed her into a room and helped her into bed.  
  
"God it hurts so much," Dixie leaned back and shut her eyes.  
  
Jake looked back at a doctor who had walked in behind him. "She needs to get an ultrasound. She needs to get this baby checked, she needs her heart checked, and that needs to be done right now." Jake looked at Dixie. "Try to relax. We're going to help you." He leaned down and kissed her forehead. She was as cold as ice. "I'll be right back."  
  
Jake turned and left the room, pausing briefly. Her temperature had him concerned. He just knew by touching her skin that this had to do with her heart. There would be no other reason for Dixie to be that cold. After a moment, Jake walked back into Tad's room.  
  
"Is she OK?" JR jumped to his feet.  
  
Jake nodded. He didn't want to upset him. "She's having some tests done now," he said. "I don't think you should worry. She's going to be OK." Jake could see that Tad knew something was wrong.  
  
"JR," Tad said. "Let me talk to Jake for a minute?"  
  
"Yeah... sure," JR said.  
  
"Just a minute." JR stood and left the room. "What's wrong with her?" Jake was silent. "You never could keep a secret, Jake. What's wrong with my wife?"  
  
"We're not sure yet. They're running some tests on her now."  
  
"Do you have any ideas?" Jake didn't answer. "Don't lie to me, please."  
  
"Her heart, Tad."  
  
Tad took a deep breath. "Can I see her?"  
  
"As soon as the test results come back I could bring you over there."  
  
"Dr. Martin?" the room door opened.  
  
"I'll be back," he said to Tad and left the room.  
  
"Jake," the doctor said. "We ran the scans on you sister-in-law."  
  
"Well?" Jake took the charts and looked them over. He took a deep breath and rubbed his eyes. "Is she awake now?"  
  
"Not completely."  
  
Jake walked into Dixie's room. "Dixie?" he said. "How are you feeling? Any better?" Dixie's eyes were heavy as she let out a soft moan. "We have you results..." he paused. "Dixie, we need to take the baby."  
  
"No," Dixie managed to say.  
  
"Listen to me," Jake said. "Your heart can't take this anymore." Dixie shook her head. "If we don't take the baby now, Dixie... you might die."  
  
"And if you take the baby..." she said. "What are it's chances." Jake didn't answer. "I can't let my baby die."  
  
"Dixie..."  
  
"How can you ask me..... to do that?" Dixie shut her eyes. "You said 'might'.... but I might be fine too, right? We could both be fine."  
  
"It's a very small chance, Dixie."  
  
Dixie began to breath heavily again. "Then I need to take that chance..." Jake opened his mouth to speak. "Unless... unless you can guarantee me... 100%... without a doubt that if you deliver... the baby now... it'll be OK... Unless you can do that... I can't let you take this baby, Jake. I won't let you." she paused. "This is my decision."  
  
"Of course it is," Jake said. "But..."  
  
"Then I've decided. I don't want you to take this baby." Dixie shut her eyes again. Jake put his hand down and touched her face. It was still frozen.  
  
He went over and grabbed another blanket, draping it over her. "You need your rest," Jake said. "I'll bring Tad in to see you in a little while OK?" Dixie nodded weakly. "Try to get some rest." Jake walked back, out of Dixie's room and paused outside the door. He walked up to the nurse's station. "I need somebody to call Palmer Cortlandt," he said.  
  
"We tried when his niece was admitted, doctor, we couldn't..."  
  
"I don't care what you have to do," Jake said. "Find him and get him down here." 


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Tad braced himself up against the wall as he tried to make his way to Dixie's room. His legs were weak and he had a bit of trouble supporting his own weight, but that was only from being in bed so long. He pushed his way inside, pausing briefly to just look at her. She looked so weak, so fragile, but as he moved closer, she turned her head slightly, her face lighting up.  
  
"Tad," she said as he pulled up a chair beside her bed. "They let you out."  
  
"No..." he said. "I snuck out." tad ran his fingers through her curls. "I wanted to see you."  
  
"Did Jake tell you?" Dixie said.  
  
"He told me that you're sick, Dix. That you can't carry the baby to term..."  
  
"He wants to take the baby now. he can't..."  
  
"Jake is looking out for your best interest."  
  
"But what about our baby?" Dixie said. "God, Tad. I knew this would happen." She paused. "After all these years of trying... I thought I would be fine. We would finally have a little baby... part of me, part of you... Now we're going to lose it all again."  
  
"Don't talk like that," Tad said.  
  
"I'm afraid, Tad." Dixie said as tears rolled down her cheeks. "I'm so afraid of what's going to happen."  
  
"Don't cry, Dix." Tad thumbed the tears from her eyes. "We've gotten through a lot. We'll get through this."  
  
Dixie shut her eyes, swallowing hard as she shook her head. "What if we don't? I'm not invincible."  
  
"You always seemed it to me." Tad smiled.  
  
"I don't feel it." Dixie paused. "We wanted this so bad. I prayed for this... and now... I may not even see this little baby."  
  
"Dixie..."  
  
"I don't want to die." Dixie cried. "I have so much here. I have Junior... I have Jamie... I have you, Tad. I don't want to lose all that."  
  
Tad took her hand in his. "You're not going to lose anything." he said. "You're going to be fine."  
  
"You can't promise that."  
  
"I believe it," Tad said, bringing his hand up to her face. "I believe it in my heart. I trust Jake. He can make this better."  
  
"Do you really believe that?"  
  
"Of course I do. You're going to be OK, Dix. I'm going to be right there with you when you bring our baby into this world. And I'm going to show you two off once we get out of the hospital. We're going to go back to living the perfect life, just like before any of this happened. Like before the accident."  
  
"I want to believe you, Tad," Dixie said. "I do."  
  
"Then believe me." tad leaned down and kissed her forehead. "I wouldn't lie to you, Dix. You know that."  
  
"I know."  
  
"Then trust me. You're a fighter. You'll get through this." Dixie smiled slightly, nodding. Tad rested his hand on her belly. "We're going to have a beautiful baby," he said as the door opened an Jake walked in.  
  
"What are you doing here?" he asked Tad.  
  
"Visiting my wife," Tad said.  
  
"She should be resting." Jake walked up to Dixie's bed. "Both of you."  
  
"We're not throwing a party in here, Jake," Tad said. "We're just talking."  
  
Jake shook his head. "I know," he said. "I just think that you should both get some rest." He paused. "I'm having some specialists come in to run some more tests on you, Dixie."  
  
"What kind of tests?" she asked.  
  
"Nothing serious," Jake said. "We just want to check on the baby's development and your heart."  
  
Dixie shifted uncomfortably in bed. "Don't move around too much," Jake said. "You don't want to pull out your IV." He turned to Tad. "And you. You should let her relax before the exams."  
  
"Yes, doctor," Tad whined. He leaned down and kissed Dixie on the lips. "I love you," he said. "I love you so much. Let the doctors do what they have to do, OK?" Dixie smiled. "You know where I'll be."  
  
Jake helped Tad to his feet. "I'll be right back," he said, helping Tad out of the room.  
  
"Have you heard anything new?" Tad asked.  
  
Jake sat down and tad followed suit. "I don't want to do this to you." Jake said.  
  
"Just tell me, Jake."  
  
"Every specialist tells us the same thing. She's not doing well, Tad."  
  
Tad ran his hand over his face. "Is she going to die, Jake?"  
  
"The baby is making her weaker and weaker..."  
  
"But is she going to die?"  
  
"I don't want to force you to choose between your wife and your child, but..."  
  
"But?"  
  
"But it might come down to that."  
  
Tad shook his head. "You're asking me to do something impossible. I wouldn't be able to make that decision... how could I?" There was silence for a moment. "What are the odds, Jake?" Tad asked. "Give me numbers."  
  
Jake took a deep breath.  
  
"We'll know more after the specialists take a look at her. But... right now... I'd say it's going to come down to a choice."  
  
"My wife or my baby."  
  
Jake was silent. "We'll know more later, Tad."  
  
Tad shook his head. "What did you go to medical school for?" His voice grew louder. "If you can't save them both, why did you go to school, Jake? Why did any of you even bother becoming doctors?" Tad pushed himself up from his seat. "Just do me a favor," he said. "Don't do anything else for me. Just keep my family alive. My whole family. Because if anything happens to Dixie... or the baby..." Jake stood, trying to steady him. "Just leave me alone, Jake." Tad said, pulling away from him. Jake stepped back, giving Tad some space. I can get back to my room on my own." Tad supported himself against the wall. "Just go back to doing... whatever exactly it is that you do."  
  
Jake folded his arms around himself as he let Tad make his way back to his room. Tad turned. Seeing that Jake had gone back to work, Tad made a detour, turning in to the chapel.  
  
It was quiet inside. He shut the door and slowly managed to make his way up to the front and take a seat. He leaned forward, his head in his hands. Tad took a deep breath.  
  
"Dixie is the one who has all the faith," Tad said. "She changed me... she gave me something to believe in. She is the greatest thing that ever happened to me in my entire life..." He paused, rubbing his eyes. "We got through everything with Adam... We got through the whole thing with Leslie Coulson and Billy Clyde Tuggle. We faced Ted in Canada and we pulled through that. We dealt with my amnesia and losing our daughter... I even thought that we had licked these heart problems." tad shook his head. "I guess I was wrong... Dixie... Dixie hasn't done anything wrong. She doesn't deserve what's happening. She shouldn't be going through this." tad leaned his head back, his eyes shut. "Don't let her die. My wife and baby... please don't let them die. I'll do anything," tad cried. "Anything. Just make this go away. I just want things to go back to they way they were before the accident. Oh, God, please. Don't take my family from me." 


	16. Chapter Sixteen

Tad leaned forward in his seat, his head in his hands. He blocked out every sound, sitting in silence. He ran his fingers back through his hair, his eyes, glazed and bloodshot. He wasn't sure how long he had been sitting in the chapel, and he didn't care. Tad could feel somebody standing behind him, but didn't turn around. If it wasn't Dixie standing there, and he knew it wasn't, he didn't much care who it was. After a moment, he saw the figure, out of the corner of his eye, take a seat beside him.  
  
Tad didn't want to look. He didn't want to talk to anyone. He just wanted to be alone. But this person wasn't moving. Tad slowly glanced over.  
  
"What, Liza?" he said. "How did you know to find me here?"  
  
Liza kept a forward glance. "I came by to see how you were feeling and Jake... told me about Dixie..."  
  
"Did he tell you that I'm going to have to choose?" he said in a raspy voice. Tad cleared his throat and rubbed his temples. "How am I supposed to do this?""  
  
Liza put her arm around Tad's shoulder. "I don't know what to say, Tad," Liza said. "You've helped Dixie through these times with her heart problems before."  
  
"She was never this pregnant when it happened." Tad said, looking Liza in the eye. "What am I going to do, Liza?"  
  
"What does Dixie want?"  
  
"She wants to wait." Tad said. "Jake wanted to take the baby, but... but Dixie said no." he paused. "I'm going to lose them both. I know I am."  
  
"Don't talk nonsense, Tad." Liza said. "You're talking nonsense."  
  
"There's nowhere to go from here," Tad stood. "Just when I think it can't get any worse. Just when I'm about to have... all of the things that I ever wanted in my entire life... I get thrown a curve ball." He paused. "It's like I'm stuck in this whirlwind. It just keeps on spinning and spinning, picking up pieces of our lives along it's path and just... throwing them in all these different directions."  
  
"It'll all cool down eventually," Liza said, still sitting, watching Tad pace the floor. "Maybe you just need somebody to talk to. Even if it's not me. Maybe Jake..."  
  
"Jake!" Tad said. "He wouldn't want to hear from me. I pretty much called him incompetent in front of the entire medical staff."  
  
"He's your brother. I think he understands where you're coming from."  
  
Tad shrugged. "Whether he understands where I'm coming from or not... it doesn't matter. It just doesn't matter, because I don't want to talk to him. I don't want to talk to anyone." he paused. "I just... want to be with my wife, Liza. I want to go sit with her, hold her hand. Tell her... " Tad swallowed. "Tell her..." Liza stood and approached Tad. She paused a moment before embracing him. Tad leaned his head down on Liza's shoulder in tears. Liza brought her hand up and rested it soothingly on the back of his head, stroking his hair gently.  
  
She took a deep breath. "I know," she said. "I know." Tad lifted his head, his face tear stained. "Everything's going to be fine." She said, pulling him towards her again. His head returned to her shoulder. She rubbed her hand up and down his back, comfortingly, as the sound of soft sobbing became the only sound to fill the silent room.  
  
  
  
Dixie rubbed her hand over her belly. she tried to keep herself composed, taking a few steady deep breaths as she shut her eyes.  
  
"Knock, knock," Dixie turned her head. "How ya feelin', honey?"  
  
"Opal." Dixie smiled as Opal approached her, taking a seat. "I'm just really tired." she said.  
  
"I woulda bet anything that Tad would be here with you."  
  
"Oh, he was. He was, but Jake needed to get the doctors in here." Dixie paused. "Have you seen Tad yet?"  
  
Opal shook her head. "Not yet. He's on my list."  
  
"How did you know I was here?" she asked. "Did Tad call you?"  
  
"No, Jake gave us a ring."  
  
"And Uncle Palmer?"  
  
"We got here as soon as we heard. He out there somewhere talkin' to Jake." Dixie smiled slightly. "I'll steer him clear of Tad, don't worry."  
  
"Tad's doing much better," Dixie said. "It's been such a long time, and he still woke up... just as good as new."  
  
Tad's strong." Opal said. "He had to deal with a whole lot growin up. You know that, darlin'."  
  
"Yeah," Dixie wiped her eyes. "I know." she paused. "Which is why I thought that... we'd pull through this too. But I don't know this time, Opal."  
  
"Don't be crazy, Dixie," opal said. "Of course you're gonna pull through this. You and Tad are gonna have a precious little baby. To keep you up all night, dirty diapers to change, 3am feedings..." Dixie let out a soft giggle. Opal smiled. "And you make sure that you get my Tad to take those early morning bottles for you."  
  
"You're kidding. I probably won't be able to tear Tad away from this baby."  
  
Opal laughed. "You know, you're right." Dixie smiled, rubbing her belly. "I'm gonna go see what's takin' Palmer so long." She stood. "You take care of yourself, Dixie." Dixie nodded, resting her head back and closing her eyes as Opal left the room. Hardly a minute later, Dixie head the door open again.  
  
"That was qui..." Dixie stopped short as she turned her head towards the door.  
  
"Just hear me out."  
  
Dixie's mouth gaped slightly. "What do you want, Adam?" 


	17. Chapter Seventeen

Adam walked further into the room, opening up his overcoat and putting his hands in his pants pockets. Dixie pushed herself up slightly in bed, cringing a bit as she did so, resting her hand on her belly.  
  
"What, Adam?" she said. "You know... How is it that you always seem to show up at the worst possible times?"  
  
"I didn't come here to get you worked up," Adam said.  
  
"Please don't tell me you're concerned about me. Because I'm tired of hearing it, Adam. I really am." Dixie paused, gently clenching her abdomen. "I think you should leave before Opal gets back with Uncle Palmer."  
  
Adam didn't budge. "I think you should take her advice." Adam heard from behind him.  
  
Adam spun around quickly. "Well if it isn't Palmer Cortlandt," he said.  
  
"I believe my niece told you to leave," Palmer said. Adam just stood, facing him, his hands still in his pockets.  
  
Dixie bit her bottom lip, nervously. "Just go, Adam," she said. But Adam still didn't move. Dixie paused for a moment. "You're just making this worse. Can't you see that?"  
  
Adam took one of his hands out of his pocket and turned to her. "I will get to talk to you, Dixie," he said. "Somehow, someway, you will hear what I have to say."  
  
"I don't think so," Dixie said. "You had your chance, Adam... but you decided to use it to travel down another road." She paused. "Please don't make me have to embarrass you by calling security."  
  
Adam shook his head slightly. Palmer approached him, grabbing him by the arm and spinning him around. Dixie's eyes widened. Adam pulled loose, straightening his jacket. He cast a glance back at Dixie and then a quick snarl at Palmer. before straightening his jacket once again and leaving the room. Palmer followed after him.  
  
"Adam!" he called. Adam stopped, looking him in the eye. "If anything... happens to Dixie, and I find out that you were anywhere near her," Palmer lowered his voice, speaking through his teeth. "I'll have you killed."  
  
Adam chuckled lightly. "You're pretty forthcoming with the threats, aren't you, Palmer?"  
  
"Oh it's not a threat. It's a promise. And you can hold me to it."  
  
Jake knew better than to get between Adam Chandler and Palmer Cortlandt. he walked right passed them into Dixie's room.  
  
"How are you feeling?" he asked.  
  
"Like there's a boxing match going on inside my chest," Dixie said as Jake began to hook up the oxygen. "Oh you're really not going to make me wear that thing in my nose again, are you?"  
  
"It's just a precautionary measure, Dixie." Jake said as he liked the tubing behind her ears.  
  
Dixie looked up at him, worried. "It's not good, is it?" she asked. "I'm not getting any better, am I, Jake?"  
  
"We're still waiting on some labs." Jake said.  
  
"But?"  
  
"It's still too early to tell." He paused. "Try not to worry yourself. Getting all worked up isn't going to help." Jake's pager went off. He looked down at it. "try to relax," he said. "I'll be back later."  
  
Dixie nodded slowly and watched Jake leave the room. There was silence for a moment before Dixie leaned over and picked up the phone. She dialed and waited for an answer.  
  
"Hi, it's me, Dixie," she said after a minute. "I need your help." 


	18. Chapter Eighteen

Tad stood at the nurse's station. "I want to sign myself out," he said. "Can't I just have the paperwork and sign myself out?" There was no response. "Come on, I'll take full responsibility. I won't hold the hospital responsible if anything happens."  
  
"Tad?" Jake approached him. "You should be back in bed."  
  
"No," he said. "No, I'm fine. I just want to get out of here. I want out of this hospital. I feel better... I feel perfectly fine."  
  
"Tad, I don't..."  
  
"Please." Tad held his hand up, interrupting him. "Don't argue with me about this, Jake. Just get me signed out of here. " There was silence for a moment. "Look, I know you want me to stay here. But I've already been here since December. I feel fine. I'm walking around... I just want to sign out of here. I want to be with Dixie. Understand that, Jake."  
  
Jake was silent. "I'll sign you out on one condition." Tad nodded. "You need to take it easy. And the minute... if anything feels strange or..."  
  
"I know, I know. I'll come right back." Jake shook his head, reluctantly handing Tad the papers to sign. Tad signed them and then stepped back. He paused. "Jake, about what I said before, about you going to medical school..."  
  
"Hey, I know," Jake said. "Forgiven, alright?" Tad smiled. "Go on, get out of here."  
  
Tad turned, making his way to Dixie's room. He pushed the door in and entered. "That's it. I'm out, I'm sprung, I'm..." he stopped short. "What are you doing here? Get the hell away from my wife, Hayward."  
  
David faced him as Tad bounded forward.  
  
"Tad!" Dixie yelled as Tad pinned David up against the wall. "Tad, stop! Stop it!"  
  
"What are you gonna do, huh?" Tad asked David, who gasped for breath under the pressure of Tad's hands. "What are you planning on injecting into Dixie now? You think you can just show up here and bless the world with your medical genius?"  
  
"Tad, stop it!" Dixie said. "I called him!" Tad looked over at Dixie, David still pinned against the wall. "Let him down, Tad. I called him."  
  
Tad slowly released his grip on David. "What?" he said in shock.  
  
"David knows my history."  
  
"And so does Jake," Tad said.  
  
"Jake's not a cardiologist," David said, rubbing his neck.  
  
"Yeah, well technically you shouldn't be either," Tad said.  
  
"Tad, please." Dixie begged. She looked over at David. "Could you come back a little later?"  
  
"Or not at all," Tad added.  
  
"I'll call later," she said. David nodded and pushed his way passed Tad and left the room.  
  
"I can't believe you called David Hayward," Tad said pacing the floor. "Of all people, you call Dr. Isavelives!"  
  
"Tad, you're not being fair," Dixie said.  
  
"Fair? I'm not being fair! Dix, you called Hayward."  
  
"You tell me what I was supposed to do, Tad. Just sit here and wait? You want me to wait for whatever's going to happen to happen?"  
  
"I can't trust David."  
  
"You don't have to." Dixie rubbed her chest. "You don't have to trust David. Trust me. You do trust me, don't you, Tad?" Tad was silent. "David would not hurt me. I believe that."  
  
"Tell that to Maria Grey, Dix. She lost her memory. Tell that to Roger Smythe. He lost his life!"  
  
"Roger was shot," Dixie said. "And Maria's memory came back."  
  
"But at what cost, Dixie? She lost five years of her life at the hands of David Hayward. I don't want you hurt."  
  
"I'm not going to get hurt." Dixie reached for Tad's hand, which he took hold of. "If I can trust David for this, why can't you?"  
  
"His track record comes to mind." Tad said. "I just think we need to explore our options."  
  
"What options?" Dixie said. "All the doctors that Jake parades in here all say the same thing. 'We don't know. We're not sure. Let's run a few more tests.' I'm sick and tired of being poked and prodded, Tad. I just want this to be over."  
  
"I don't think that going with David Hayward is our best course of action."  
  
"He's the only course of action."  
  
"No," he said. "He's not getting back in here. Even if I have to get a cop to stand guard outside your door." Tad paused. "Hayward should be behind bars, not in a hospital practicing medicine."  
  
"I'm not looking for an argument, Tad I'm really not feeling up to that right now." She paused. "So can we drop this now? Please?"  
  
"Dix..."  
  
"Please, Tad? I really can't take this, anymore, OK? Tad?"  
  
"OK," he said. "OK." Tad sat down on her bed, throwing his feet up. She rested her head on his shoulder. "David Hayward just brings my blood to a boil."  
  
"I know," Dixie said, weaving her fingers with his. "I know you hate his guts. I'm sorry."  
  
"No, no, no," Tad said, resting his chin on the top of her head. "Don't be sorry. You don't have to be sorry."  
  
"It's just that... nobody has any answers." Dixie's eyes began to water. "I know I'm not getting any better. I know that my heart has taken just about as much as it can take." Dixie pursed her lips. "It's for real this time," she managed to choke out. "There's no way of getting away from this... not even with David's help."  
  
"Stop this, Dixie." Tad said. "You're going to be fine. I told you that. Jake is going to figure something out. I'm sure of it. We're going to have our baby. We're going to go back to being the family that we were before all this happened. We'll pick up right where we left off." He paused. "You are a fighter. You always have been and you always will be. Don't you dare give up on that now, Dixie. Don't you ever give up on that."  
  
Dixie cried softly on Tad's shoulder. "I'm just so scared." she said. "I'm so scared, Tad. I don't know what to do."  
  
"Shh," Tad said, bringing his hand up to the back of her head. "That's why I'm here. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere, OK? I promise. For as long as you're in here, I'm not going to leave."  
  
"What about Junior... and Jamie."  
  
"They can stay with Brooke," Tad said. "She won't mind, believe me. We all just want you to get better. And you're going to."  
  
"You always sound so sure of yourself." Dixie said.  
  
"Well, that's because I am," he smiled. "I'm sure of this Dixie. I'm sure of our love. Your heart isn't the only one you've got beating for you right now. You have mine too. Two hearts. Look at those odds now Dix. How can we lose? We can't.... and we won't. I swear to you." Tad paused. "I love you Dixie and I'm not going to let anything happen to you. I promised to protect you, and I will. At any cost." 


	19. Chapter Nineteen

Tad sat slouched in a chair beside Dixie's bed, asleep. His arms folded across his chest.  
  
"Tad," Brooke whispered, gently shaking his arm. "Tad." Tad stirred, rubbing his eyes.  
  
"What time is it?" he asked.  
  
"About eight o'clock." Brooke said. She paused. "Why don't you go home and get a few hours of sleep, in a bed?"  
  
"No," he said. "No, I don't want to leave her."  
  
"Tad, you're wearing yourself out. You haven't eaten in days. You get maybe two hours of sleep a night. You look like you've dropped at least ten pounds." Tad yawned again. "At least go home and get something to eat... or take a shower."  
  
He shook his head. "I can't leave her."  
  
"Look. I'll hold down the fort while you're gone." Tad was reluctant. "You need to eat something, Tad. You're going to end up right back in here if you don't." She paused. "I'll call you if we need you. Go home, Tad."  
  
Tad cast a quick glance at Dixie. She slept peacefully, her hand resting on her belly. "You'll call?" he asked.  
  
"As long as you promise to get some rest."  
  
"You drive a hard bargain," Tad said. Brooke raised her eyebrows. "Food, shower and a nap. Deal." Tad got to his feet, stretching as Brooke sat in the chair. "Brooke," He looked at her. "Thanks."  
  
Brooke smiled, reaching out and taking his hand briefly. After a moment, Tad released his grip, and paused before leaving the room.  
  
Tad got on to the elevator and rode it down to the lobby. He walked out of the hospital, going into his pocket and grabbing his keys. He made his way to his car and got in. He just sat there for a minute, the key in the ignition and his hands on the steering wheel. Tad took a deep breath as he started the car and slowly pulled out of the lot.  
  
Tad managed to keep his eyes open and on the road as he made his way through the streets of Pine Valley and into his driveway at 646 Holland Avenue. He parked his car and stepped out, finding the key to the front door as he approached it.  
  
Tad entered the house, hitting the lights on his way in. It was so empty. Not a single person around, not a sound throughout the entire home. Tad tossed the keys down on a small table before walking into the kitchen.  
  
"We wouldn't have any food," he said, going through the cupboard. "Nobody's been home." He opened the cookie jar, sticking his hand in and pulling out a few Oreos. "I really hope you guys are green because of some strange festive season I don't know about." Tad said, speaking to the cookie as if it were a person. He took the cookies, walking out of the kitchen and over to the answering machine. No messages. "Figures," he said, popping an Oreo into his mouth. He made a face as he chewed on the stale cookie. He placed the rest of the Oreos down beside the answering machine.  
  
Tad turned and walked up to the bathroom, turning on the water in the tub. He waited for the water to become luke-warm before stepping into the shower. Automatically, his muscles began to relax as the water ran over his body. Tad rubbed his face, taking a deep breath. Brooke was right, Tad thought. He was exhausted. He could feel the heaviness in his eyes. Plus, he still hadn't fully recovered from all those months in bed. His muscles still ached, but at least now he could get a little bit of rest.  
  
After a while, Tad stepped out of the shower. He draped himself in a terry cloth robe, rubbing the towel over his wet hair. He walked out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. He pulled out a pair of pants and shirt from the closet, sitting on the edge of the bed as he began to dress.  
  
Tad felt a bit refreshed as he stood and walked back down to the living room. He began to tuck in his shirt, walking over to the phone, where he had put down his cookies. Picking up one of the Oreos, Tad noticed the light on the answering machine flashing. "Hmm," Tad said, popping another cookie in his mouth. He pressed play on the machine.  
  
"Tad," he heard Brooke's voice. She sounded shaken, frantic. "Tad? Are you home?" Tad's jaw dropped slightly as he heard a violent knock at the front door.  
  
Tad made his way to the door as the banging continued. He swung it inward. Brooke stood there, a look of nervousness on her face.  
  
"Tad," she said. "Tad, we need to go." She reached for his hand.  
  
"What?" he said. "What's wrong?"  
  
"Dixie," she said. "Dixie... I tried to call you."  
  
Tad's eyes widened. "Dixie? What happened to Dixie? What happened to her?"  
  
"We need to go. We need to get back to the hospital now."  
  
"Brooke!"  
  
"It's her heart, Tad!" Brooke said. "Dixie's heart gave out on her. They were working on her when I left."  
  
"Oh, my God," Tad said.  
  
"I'll drive you back." she said. "We've got to go. We've got to go now."  
  
Tad ran out of the house and down to Brooke's car. Brooke hit the lights off inside the house, closed the door and raced after Tad. 


	20. Chapter Twenty

Tad ran into PVH. He was shaking nervously, his eyes tear filled. "Where's my wife?" Tad said. Brooke stood behind him, gently holding his arm. "Where is she?" Tad looked up and saw his brother. "Jake!" he said, rapidly approaching him. "Where's Dixie? Is she OK?"  
  
Jake's face was long. "Tad..." he said. "I think you should sit."  
  
"I don't want to sit." he said. "I don't want to sit. Where's Dixie? Where's my wife, Jake?"  
  
"Sit down, Tad."  
  
Brooke looked over at him. "Sit down, Tad."  
  
"What am I being double teamed here?" Tad said. "Will you just tell me what's wrong with my wife."  
  
Jake ran his fingers back through his hair. "Dixie... she went into cardiac arrest." He paused. "We were able to get her heart started again, but... Tad, we had to take the baby. If we didn't, we would have lost them both."  
  
"Is Dixie OK? And... and our baby?" Jake was silent. "Please tell me they're OK."  
  
Jake bit his bottom lip. She tiny, Tad. But she's strong..."  
  
"A little girl," Tad said. "My little girl." he paused. "And Dixie? What about Dixie?"  
  
Jake silently shook his head. "It doesn't look good."  
  
"What... what do you mean?"  
  
"She's holding on... She's weak, Tad."  
  
Tad sank down in a seat, Brooke sat down beside him, taking his hand. "Is she going to die?" Tad asked, simply.  
  
"We're doing all we can," Jake said, resting his hand on his brother's shoulder. "Everything in our power..."  
  
"But it's not enough, is it?" Tad choked out. "I'm going to lose her, aren't I? Just tell me, Jake. Please tell me. Is Dixie going to die?" A tear rolled down Brooke's cheek at Jake's silence. "I'm not going to let her die, Jake," Tad said. "I can't... I won't let her go." Tad paused, wiping his eyes. "I want to see her." he said. "Take me to see her."  
  
Jake nodded as Tad stood, starting to walk down the hall. Jake looked down at Brooke after making sure that Tad was far enough away. "Call the boys," he said. "I think we're going to need them down here tonight."  
  
"Oh, Jake..." she said. "You don't really think that she's..."  
  
"We can only pray," Jake said. "It's the only thing left for us to do."  
  
Tad cast a glance back at Jake and Brooke. He knew what was going on. He knew what they were saying to eachother, and it just continues to solidify in his mind as he saw Brooke get to her feet and Jake pull her into an embrace. Tad shook his head, walking into Dixie's room. He entered slowly, making his way to her bed. She was fragile looking, IV's in her arms, tubing of oxygen resting under her nose.  
  
Tad took a seat beside her, taking her hand in his. "Dixie?" he said softly. "Hey there, sweetheart. I'm here." Tad ran his fingers back through her hair. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere." He paused, running his free hand under his nose. "I need you, Dix. You can't leave me. We have a little girl. We have a little girl, Dixie. I can't raise our daughter on my own. So you... you fight this. You fight harder than you've ever fought before... for anything. Don't you dare leave me, Dixie. I can't live without you." 


	21. Chapter TwentyOne

"This is un-freaking-believable." JR said as he paced the waiting room floor. "I thought everything was going to fine. First Tad, now Mom."  
  
"I'm sure everything's going to be OK, JR," Jamie said. "Dixie's been through this before..."  
  
"It's not fair. This isn't fair." he paused. "I need some air."  
  
JR rushed out of the waiting room, passed Brooke. "Where's JR going?" she asked Jamie.  
  
"To get some air," he said, slouching back in his chair.  
  
Brooke sat down beside him. "How are you doing, honey?" she asked. "Are you OK?"  
  
"This is all just hard to believe," he said. "You know? Dixie was just doing so well and then this happens."  
  
"I know," Brooke said, putting her arm around him. He rested his head on her shoulder. "We can all just be there for eachother. Everything will be OK."  
  
"Jamie?" Jamie and Brooke looked up and saw Jake standing before them. "I know it's a little late but... how'd you like to see your sister?"  
  
"Mom?" Jamie said.  
  
Brooke nodded. "Go ahead. Get your mind off of all of this for a while."  
  
Jamie left the waiting room with Jake and Brooke stayed behind. After a moment, she stood and made her way down the hall to Dixie's room. She paused momentarily outside the door, before pushing her way in. The room was dark, but Brooke could see Tad sitting beside Dixie's bed, one of his hands up to his face and the other gently fingering through her hair.  
  
"Tad?" Brooke said, softly. Tad jumped slightly. "Sorry." she said. "You need a break? A cup of coffee or something?"  
  
Tad shook his head. "The last time I left her..."  
  
"I know," Brooke said. "I know. You won't be long. Ten minutes. Fifteen maybe. It's almost 2:30. You've been up all night."  
  
Tad was silent for a moment. "How are the boys?"  
  
Brooke shrugged. "Jamie went to go see the baby. JR... he went out to get some air."  
  
"That does sound like a good idea," Tad said, stretching. "Could you just... could you sit with her until I get back?"  
  
"Of course," Brooke said. "Of course I will. Take your time."  
  
Tad leaned over, gently kissing Dixie's forehead. "I'll be right back, sweetheart," he whispered before standing. He paused a moment, looking down at Dixie and then walked out of the room.  
  
Tad boarded the elevator and rode it down to the lobby. He made his way outside and paused, letting the crisp breeze blow back the hair on his head. He gazed up at the star filled sky in thought, taking a deep breath as he folded his arms across his chest.  
  
After a moment, Tad turned to his right, walking a few feet before coming to a stop. He rested his back up against the building, sliding down to sit on the cool concrete.  
  
JR sat beside him, his face tear stained and his eyes still watering. Tad silently looked over at him. "You needed to just get away from everything in there?" Tad asked.  
  
JR nodded, clenching his fist slightly. He took a deep breath, putting his hand in Tad's and opening his fist. "You have no idea how much I wanted to." JR said as Tad opened his hand, viewing the contents. "How much I just wanted to light that up and... just get so high that I couldn't remember a thing that was going on in there." He paused, running his sleeve under his nose. "I wanted to... I was going to, but... I didn't."  
  
"Good choice," Tad said as he put the joint in his pocket. "I've been where you are, JR. The drugs, the not thinking that you can handle a lot of what life throws at you..."  
  
"This isn't fair," JR said. "What did she ever do to deserve this?"  
  
"She didn't do anything," Tad said. "Nobody could ever do anything to deserve something like this."  
  
"Mom... was so excited about the baby," JR said. "I mean... when you were in there, after your accident, she would talk to you for hours about how happy your two were going to be. You should have seen her face, Tad."  
  
"I could imagine," Tad smiled. "Your Mom's got a lot pulling for her, JR. She loves you boys more than anything in this world and I know that she's not going to give this all up without a good fight."  
  
"I've given her hell," JR said. "So much more than she ever deserved. I wish I could take it all back, you know."  
  
"Your Mom knows that you love her." JR sniffled, wiping his eyes. "And she knows... and appreciates everything that you've done for her while I was cooped up in that hospital. You helped her through her pregnancy, JR. You made sure she rested. You made sure she didn't miss any of her appointments. You took care of her."  
  
"But what is there left to do now?" JR said. "Wait for a miracle?"  
  
Tad lifted his head, staring up at the stars. "Dixie put a lot of trust in miracles. She always has." Tad bit his bottom lip silently. "I saw my first miracle when I met your Mom. And then when she had you. And... we've had quite a few after that." Tad paused. "Miracles haven't been strangers to us Martins. I think your Mom made me realize that. I'm not going to give up on her. She's going to pull through this. I'm sure of it." There was silence for a long moment before Tad got to his feet. "Come on." he said, looking down at JR. "Let's go see the baby... before Jamie hogs her all to himself."  
  
JR smiled slightly, pausing a moment before standing also. They made their way back into the hospital slowly, Tad putting his arm around the boy's shoulder as they entered and boarded the elevator. 


	22. Chapter TwentyTwo

Dixie had lasted through the night, which was a relief. She didn't seem any stronger, but at least she hadn't gotten any worse. Her heartbeat was steady. Weak, but steady and her face had regained a bit of color.  
  
Tad still sat wide awake at her bedside, her hand in his as he ran his thumb over her palm. He took a deep breath, leaning forward in his seat slightly.  
  
"Can you hear me, Dix?" Tad said as he moved his hand and began stroking her hair. "Our little girl is even more beautiful than anyone could have ever imagined. She looks just like you. She's got... those beautiful blue eyes of yours and... a personality to boot. I can just tell." Tad paused as he ran his fingers over her face. "She's so strong and... Jake says that she's an eating machine." he laughed. "I guess she takes after me with that one." Tad's smile faded slowly. "She needs a name too you know. She can't go her whole life as 'Baby Girl' Martin. That precious little girl needs a name. And picking one out is something I refuse to do without you." He paused, remaining silent for a while before leaning forward and kissing her forehead. "Come back to me, sweetheart. Please come back to me."  
  
"Dad?" Tad heard from behind him. He didn't need to turn around. Jamie slowly approached him, handing over a cup of coffee. "How's Dixie?" Tad was silent, running his fingers through her hair. "She looks like she's doing better." Tad nodded slowly. "The baby's doing good. Uncle Jake said that maybe she could come home in a few days... Dad?"  
  
"Hmm?" Tad asked, looking up at Jamie.  
  
"Don't take this the wrong way or anything, but... you look like a mess. You've been up all night with her." Jamie paused. "Mom's worried about you."  
  
"I'm fine." Tad said. "Tell your mother that I'm fine... Really. I'm fine."  
  
"Come on, Dad," Jamie said. "You know that she'd want to hear that from you." He paused. "I just came from seeing the baby and..."  
  
"Oh... you guys are trying to get me out of here."  
  
"You're going to lose your mind locked up in here. We just thought that you should get out for a little while. You haven't spent too much time with the baby and... well... I could sit with Dixie for a while. I'd really like to." Tad didn't budge for a moment, his hand still in Dixie's hair. "Please," Jamie said. "Dad..."  
  
Tad stood slowly, offering his seat to his son. "If you need me," he said. "I'll be in the nursery."  
  
"I know," Jamie replied. Tad put his hand on the boy's shoulder briefly, looking down at Dixie before turning and starting towards the nursery.  
  
His mind was a jumble as he made his way down the hall, contemplating whether or not he should have left Dixie's side. Whether or not he should be walking through these halls. But this all came to a stop as he stood outside the nursery, looking in at his baby girl.  
  
She was wide awake and calm. The only baby in the nursery who was neither sleeping or crying. She just kicked her tiny feet and reached for the little pink beanie on her head.  
  
Tad could feel a lump form in his throat as he was overcome with an enormous sense of pride. He smiled, taking a deep breath as he felt a hand come down on his shoulder. Tad turned.  
  
"Pop," he said. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"I came to see my granddaughter," Joe said as he stood beside Tad, looking into the nursery.  
  
"She's beautiful," Tad said. "Isn't she? She's all Dixie."  
  
"I don't know," Joe said. "I think I can see a bit of you in her."  
  
"You think so?" Tad asked, looking at his daughter. She seemed to stare right back at him. A happy, healthy baby, who aside from her size would be difficult to tell she was almost three months premature. "She's got Dixie's strength, that's for sure."  
  
"Why don't you take her down to Dixie's room?" Joe said.  
  
Tad looked at his father with a sense of nervous inquisition. "Are you sure she's well enough for that? The baby?"  
  
"Jake has had her examined," Joe explained. "She is strong... and healthy. And I think that Dixie needs to have both you and your daughter in the same room. I'll sign for your clearance."  
  
Tad smiled. "Thanks, Pop." He quickly embraced his father. "Thanks." 


	23. Chapter TwentyThree

Brooke sat at a table in the cafeteria, sipping a cup of coffee and looking over a stack of papers. "What do you have a death wish?" Brooke heard. She turned around and saw Edmund standing behind her. "That stuff will kill you."  
  
"Yeah, well I guess we're in the right place." Brooke said. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"We heard about Dixie." Edmund said. "How's she doing?"  
  
"She made it through the night. Jake didn't think that she would make it that long."  
  
"How about Tad?"  
  
"He's hanging in there. Dixie was fine one minute... I talked him into going home to get some rest and her heart gives out." Brooke paused. "If I had just let him stay..."  
  
"Woah," Edmund said, taking a seat at the table with her. "Woah, hold on a minute. Don't start blaming yourself."  
  
"I pushed him to go. He wanted to stay with her..."  
  
"Brooke, stop," he said, taking her hands. "Stop it. You didn't know this was going to happen. You couldn't have known. You were being a good friend. Tad knows that. Don't drive yourself crazy over this. It's not your fault."  
  
"Yeah, well I still feel lousy about it.  
  
"Is Tad angry with you?" Brooke shook her head. "So then don't be angry with yourself. It's not worth it."  
  
Brooke shook her head, resting it in her hands. "I suppose," she said. "I just keep on thinking of what would have happened if I gave him two more hours with her."  
  
"Everyone is here now." Brooke rubbed her eyes. "But maybe you should go home and get some sleep. Have you been here all night?"  
  
Brooke looked at her watch. "17 hours, 34 minutes and counting," she paused. "The boys are here. I think I should stay with them."  
  
"They'll be fine. They have Tad."  
  
"Tad isn't exactly in his right mind at the moment."  
  
"Then I'll stick around for a while." Brooke opened her mouth to speak, but Edmund continued. "I know I'm not Jamie's favorite person right now, but I'd be glad to do this. you look like you could go for forty winks."  
  
"I've got a lot of work I need to catch up on."  
  
Edmund gathered up the papers from in front of her. "Give yourself a break, Brooke," he said. "I'll take care of this."  
  
"Edmund, you don't need to, I'm..."  
  
"...exhausted. You've been up for over 24 hours. You're going to wear yourself out."  
  
"That sounds so familiar," Brooke said. "Look, Edmund. I know you're concerned and I appreciate that, I do. But... I owe it to Tad to be here. I'll be fine. I've got my mud coffee and stale danish. I'm OK. As for the work, it keeps me from completely losing my mind." Edmund leaned back in his seat folding his arms across his chest. Brooke smiled, standing and taking hold of his shoulder. "I'm OK but... thank you."  
  
"Tad?" Maria called to him as he stood outside Dixie's room. "Tad, we just heard about what happened. "How's Dixie doing?"  
  
"Hanging on," Tad said. "Her heart is... from carrying the baby it's..."  
  
"I know," Maria said, gently touching his shoulder. "But Dixie got this far. It's all uphill from here."  
  
"It's going to be quite a hike to reach the top," Tad said.  
  
"She can handle it," Maria smiled.  
  
Tad took a deep breath. "I feel like we should take up permanent residence in this place. Put curtains in the room, paint the walls. That white is kind of drab." Tad paused, massaging his temples.  
  
"She's going to be fine, Tad. Have faith."  
  
Tad silently nodded. "We're hoping maybe she responds to the baby."  
  
"Joe's bringing her down here?"  
  
"For a while," Tad said. "He thinks it might help her to have her daughter..." Tad ran his hand back over his hair.  
  
Maria slowly reached out and took his hands. "It's alright." she said. "We're talking about Dixie here. We all know she's a fighter." Maria put her arms around Tad, resting his head down on her shoulder. "And I know she'll pull through this." 


	24. Chapter TwentyFour

Tad sat on the floor outside Dixie's room, his back against the wall, asleep. His head bobbed forwards and he caught himself, rubbing his eyes and yawning. He pushed himself up off of the floor, stretching.  
  
"Did somebody order a baby?" Joe Martin said as he came down the hall.  
  
"Extra sweet?" Tad said. "That was me." Joe stopped and Tad took hold of the little girl. "Hi, sweetheart. You ready to go see your Mommy?"  
  
"I'll come by in an hour or two to see how you're doing," Joe said.  
  
"Alright. Thanks, Pop." Tad looked back down at the baby. "Okey dokey. Let's get going."  
  
Tad turned and walked into Dixie's room. He approached the bed and took a seat in the chair, cradling the baby in his arms. "Here she is, Dix." Tad said. "The answer to all our prayers." The baby cooed. "She's precious and... perfect. She's perfect, Dixie. How about opening up those beautiful eyes of yours and giving her a gander." Tad looked over at Dixie. She was still. "Come on, sweetheart." Tad gently lifted his hand and wiped his eyes. "I know you want to go home... And I want to take you home. You and our little girl. We're all just waiting for you to wake up so we can sign you out of here." Tad paused. "Oh and I mean all of us, Dix. Jake, Jamie, JR, Brooke... Pop is here. Even Maria and Edmund." He ran his hand over his face. "I swore to you that we'd get through this without David Hayward. Didn't I? Don't turn me into a liar, honey. Please don't do that."  
  
Tad felt the baby squirm in his arms. "Shh. Shh," he said. "Please don't start crying. Your daddy's got the singing voice of a screech owl." The child let out a tiny moan. "Shh," Tad gently rocked her in his arms. "Go easy on your old man, this stuff is new to me. I've only had a tiny bit of practice with your brother. Shh." Tad kissed the little girl's head. "Your brothers are gonna take real good care of you. JR and Jamie are... They're great kids and they're gonna... you're gonna have a lot of fun with them. We all love you so much... 'Baby Girl' Martin." Tad's eyes shut as he cradled the baby.  
  
"She can't go her whole life like that you know."  
  
Tad opened his eyes slowly. "Dix?"  
  
Dixie's eyes were still shut. "We need to find her a name." she said softly. Her eyes easing open. She smiled weakly at him.  
  
"Dixie," Tad moved from his chair and sat on the edge of her bed. "Sweetheart," he kissed her head. "You gave us a scare."  
  
"Like I could ever leave you." Dixie said. "What would you do without me?"  
  
"You weren't going anywhere. You've got too much to live for now.  
  
"I always did." she said. "Always." Dixie paused. "Are you gonna hog that little baby, or are you gonna let me hold her?"  
  
Tad smiled. "You think you have the energy?" Dixie pushed herself up slightly in bed, nodding. Tad handed the baby to her. "Don't let her grab at your oxygen."  
  
"Hi," Dixie cooed at the baby. "Hi there, sweetheart. You're a little miracle you know that. You are." Dixie tilted her head to the side and rested it against Tad's arm. He ran his fingers through her hair. "I can't wait to get you home, you precious little angel."  
  
"Well as soon as Jake takes a look at you, we'll see when we can get you two out of here." Tad paused. "Until then, I'm not going anywhere. I'm not leaving you or our little girl."  
  
"Who still doesn't have a name," Dixie said, gazing down at the baby.  
  
"Such a sweet, perfect little girl should have a name that fits her really well." Tad said.  
  
Dixie paused, looking down at the child in her arms. "Well," she said. "How about Kate. Many a time have I heard the stories of Grandma Kate offering you all types of sensible advice, Tad."  
  
Tad smiled slightly. "I think I like it," he said. "Katie Martin. It has that ring to it." He paused, running his fingers gently over the baby. "Hi there, Katie."  
  
"Now if this isn't a Kodak moment," she said. "I don't know what is." Dixie's eyes began to tear as she looked at Tad. "I love you so much." Tad gently thumbed the tears from her eyes, Dixie smiling softly at him. He slowly tilted his head downward and her eyes fluttered shut as their lips met. 


	25. Chapter TwentyFive

Dixie rested her head up against Tad's shoulder, a smile on her face as she gently rocked the sleeping baby in her arms. Tad kissed her forehead, running his fingers through her curls.  
  
"I couldn't think of a more perfect moment," Tad said, softly. "I have everything I need right here in this room." Tad kissed her deeply, Dixie leaning into him as there was a soft rap at the door.  
  
"Is everyone decent in there?" Jake asked through the door.  
  
Tad shook his head with a soft chuckle. "You're safe!" he called. Jake popped his head in.  
  
"Hey, you," he said, walking up to Dixie. "I'm glad to see you awake. "  
  
"I understand I was knocking on Heaven's door for a while," she smiled. "I told St. Peter to hold onto my wings for another sixty or so years. What would Tad do without me?" She looked up at him and smiled.  
  
"Roam the world aimlessly," Tad laughed.  
  
"Did you come to give me a clean bill of health, doc?"  
  
"I'm going to give it a shot." Dixie handed Kate to Tad as Jake took his stethoscope and began to listen to Dixie 's chest.  
  
"How's it sound in there?" Dixie asked after a moment. "Am I 'lubbing' and 'dubbing' when I should be?" Jake was silent as he listened. "Jake? Is everything OK?"  
  
Jake looked up at Dixie and Tad. "Everything's... perfect." he smiled. Jake seemed genuinely surprised. "This is beyond words, beyond... explanation. It's..."  
  
"A miracle," Tad said, glancing from the baby to Dixie. "that's exactly what it is."  
  
There was silence for a moment. "So do I get a clean bill of health?" Dixie asked. "Can I get out of here sometime soon?"  
  
"You know what," Jake said. "I don't want to jump into anything. But... I think that you just might be seeing home sooner than you think. I'm going to let one of the other doctors take a look at you first."  
  
"Sounds good." Dixie smiled.  
  
"Now..." Jake stood. "I'm going to need to steal Tad and that beautiful niece of mine. We got to get her back to the nursery for a while."  
  
"Aww," Dixie moaned. "At least hand her over her one more time." Tad handed Kate to Dixie. "Hey, honey," she cooed. "You're gonna have to go for a little while, but... your Daddy and I... we're gonna come by and see you real soon, OK?" Dixie kissed the baby gently, before handing her back to Tad.  
  
"I'll be right back." Tad said, leaning down and kissing Dixie gingerly on the lips. "OK? Try to get some rest."  
  
"Don't keep him too long, Jake," Dixie smiled.  
  
"I won't," Jake assured her. He and Tad made their way out of Dixie's room. "She's doing a lot better."  
  
"We've got somebody watching our backs," Tad said. He looked at Jake momentarily before handing him the baby.  
  
"Do you have a name for this little angel yet?" Jake asked.  
  
"Yeah," Tad said, folding his arms across his chest. "Kate."  
  
"For Gram."  
  
Tad nodded. "She's a strong little girl. She should be named after a strong woman."  
  
"Well, that was Gram." Jake gazed down at the baby, pausing for a moment. "This little one's going to give you a run for your money. She's gonna be a heart breaker."  
  
"What are you kidding?" Tad said. "I'm already checking out convents." Tad and Jake chuckled. "You're good with her."  
  
Jake shrugged slightly. "She's a good baby. That has nothing to do with me."  
  
"You have baby presence."  
  
"Baby presence?" Jake laughed.  
  
"No, I'm serious." Tad said. "You're going to do really great with your own family some day."  
  
"Don't rush the issue, Tad. Mia and I are..."  
  
"...sure taking your sweet time if you ask me." Tad interrupted. He smiled. "You two are happy together. That's even more obvious than the nose on your face. So why don't you just set a date already?"  
  
"We don't want to rush into this." Jake said. "We want to get it right... the first time around."  
  
"Say no more." Tad said. "Say no more... I mean it." Jake laughed softly. "Seriously though, you and Mia are going to be really happy together.  
  
"As happy as you and Dixie are, I hope." he said. Jake paused. "I'd better get this little beauty back to the nursery. You two are in the clear now. You were right, Tad. It's a miracle."  
  
Tad just smiled as Jake turned and walked with Kate back to the nursery. He paused a moment before walking back into Dixie's room. Jake was right. He and Dixie were happy. They always would be. 


	26. Conclusion

Tad pulled his car into the driveway at 646 Holland Avenue. He put it into park, looking over at Dixie. Dixie returned his gaze, a wide smile on her face.  
  
"I've missed this place," Dixie said. "I just want to get inside, put the baby down for the night and..." Tad leaned over gently cupping her cheek and kissing her softly. "Mmm. Starting early?" Dixie said against his lips. "Let's get inside first." She slowly pulled back from Tad and stepped out of the car, proceeding to the backseat, removing Kate from the carseat. Tad walked around behind Dixie, burying his face in the crook of her neck. "Tad," Dixie said with a laugh. "The baby... let me get Katie inside and put her down. You think you can wait a few more minutes?"  
  
"I don't know," Tad said. "That's going to be quite a feat."  
  
"Give it a shot, OK?" Dixie backed away from the car, shutting the door with her foot. Tad walked beside her up to the front door, turning the key in the lock and entering. Tad reached out and flipped the lights on.  
  
"Surprise!" Tad and Dixie jumped, looking around the room. By the sofa stood Jake, Joe , Ruth and Opal. A few feet away from the, Brooke, Jamie and JR. Hanging above the door was a banner. 'Welcome Home Tad, Dixie and Kate!'  
  
Dixie looked at Tad. "Did you know about this?" she asked.  
  
Tad shook his head, looking around. No. I had no idea."  
  
"Welcome home, big brother," Jake said, approaching them. Tad embraced his brother and then Jake turned. "Welcome home, Dixie."  
  
"How did you guys..." Tad started. "How did you do this?"  
  
"We have keys, Dad." Jamie laughed. "It wasn't that hard."  
  
"We wanted to make this special for you guys," JR added. "We're you surprised?"  
  
"Surprised isn't the word," Tad said. "I don't know what to say."  
  
"This isn't it." Ruth said. "You've got a full refrigerator..."  
  
"You really shouldn't have." Dixie smiled.  
  
"Ah, but that's not it, honey," Opal said as Dixie handed the baby to Joe.  
  
"Yeah," Brooke added. "You haven't seen the best part yet."  
  
"The best part?" Tad asked.  
  
"Ooo, just follow me, honey," Opal said. "Right this way, right this way." she chimed.  
  
Tad and Dixie looked at eachother before following Ruth, Brooke and Opal. They came to a stop outside the bedroom.  
  
"Why am I afraid of what I'm going to see behind this door?" Tad said as Dixie gently elbowed him. "Oww."  
  
"You two just hold on a minute." Opal swung the door in, stepping back as Tad and Dixie entered.  
  
"Oh my..." Dixie said as they looked around. The room was filled with things for the baby; toys, clothes, blankets. "How did you..."  
  
"We started right after she was born."  
  
Dixie wrapped her arms around Tad's waist. "I don't know what to say." she said.  
  
"Just say you like it," Opal smiled.  
  
"We love it," Tad said. "He hugged Opal, then Ruth and Brooke.  
  
"Welcome home," Brooke said. "And uh... don't worry about the boys. JR is spending the night with me and Jamie."  
  
"And I think Joe has already kidnapped that poor little baby," Opal laughed. "We just... well... we'll just be on our way then. Come on, girls, let's give these two love birds some privacy."  
  
"Thanks again, you guys," Dixie said. The three woman smiled at eachother, leaving the room. Dixie clung tighter to Tad. "God we have the greatest family," she said.  
  
"The best," Tad said, kissing the top of her head. Dixie pulled away, looking up at him briefly. "What are you thinking?"  
  
"We came so close to losing eachother." Dixie said. "To losing everything. I don't know what I would do without you, Tad."  
  
Tad gently ran his fingers through her hair. "Thankfully we won't have to find out." he said. "There's nothing that we can't handle. And no matter how rocky the road gets, Dix, we'll always have eachother."  
  
"Always," Dixie said, smiling up at him.  
  
"We're going to spend the rest of our lives together, Dixie Martin. We're going to watch three wonderful children grow up." he paused. "We're going to be... racing our motorized wheelchairs around Pine Valley." Dixie laughed, resting her head up against his chest. Tad gently took hold of her chin and lifted it so that she gazed into his eyes. "I love you, Dixie."  
  
Tears began to well up in Dixie's eyes as she brought her hand up and ran the tips of her fingers over Tad's cheek. "I love you, Tad." she said. Dixie threw her arms up around his neck. "I love you so much."  
  
Tad wrapped his arms around Dixie's waist, lifting her off the ground, closer to him, letting their lips meet. Their love ran freely, each knowing that whatever life threw at them next they were ready to face it. Together. 


End file.
